I've recently had the opportunity to meet with some friends of mine to talk about what it means to love God as a homosexual. Ultimately, I can't say we've come to many solid conclusions, but we have made a commitment to seek God and his truth above all else--no matter what it looks like. I may refer to this ongoing discussion from time to time because I believe it is one of the most relevant conversations a Christian can have in our culture and time of history. I would be interested in any (non-anonymous) feedback you would be willing to offer.
Here are a couple initial thoughts from my recent conversations:
---God loves gay people! No matter where we go from here, we have to acknowledge that Jesus died for everyone and any person, gay or straight, who is intereseted in knowing God throug him should be embraced and encouraged. Behavior and baggage come in second to establishing relationship with God.
---Scripture cannot be ignored. We may not understand certain things about God's word, but we cannot throw things out that look, on the surface, to speak against what we think or how we feel. We must commit to an honest search of God's truth which is presented to us in scripture.
---The vast majority of homosexuals did not choose to be gay. It may not be genetics, but even if you believe conditioning influences sexuality, a small child who is lacking authentic and balanced love or is being hurt intentionally by an adult is not choosing the sexuality they grow up with. There are some people, I believe, who choose sexual perversion as adults--these people are purposefully trying to do anything they can think of to distort God's creation--they are not, by far, representative of the bredth of the homosexual population.
Here are three questions my friends and I have agreed to grapple with in light of homosexuality and scripture:
1. What do we do (as homosexuals) with the reality that men and women are created to be compatible sexually?
2. What do we do with the fact that God has laid out a pretty clear picture of marriage between men and women and the relevance of balanced gender roles in raising children?
3. How much of who I am now has to do with things that I've experienced or things that were withheld from me in my childhood.
In Romans 1, Paul states that one of his purposes for writing to the Christians in Rome is so that he can encourage them in their faith----and so he can be encouraged in his faith by them. The bottom line in my relationship with these new friends of mine is that I want to help shepherd them in their relationship with God and I want to learn about God and his profound love for his children through their journey and friendship.
Once again, I'm so pleased to be part of a church community where these topics can be addressed. I'm glad we address these things, not in theory or doctrinal conjecture, but inasmuch as they relate to the lives of the people we love.
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9 comments:
Wow! This may be the best Christian approach to this topic I've ever read. No blanket statements. No effort to be pc or leagalistic! Using words like "we" instead of "I". Posing questions instead of assuming answers. Talking about "loving" and what does the "Bible" say in the same breath! Taking a position of humility instead of authority!
It actually sounds like a discussion born out of love for people instead of a debate just for the fun of it to ruffle feathers or make someone feel better.
Be careful! Who knows what kind of humans your group might reach with hearts like this! (Sarcasm/compliment obvious I hope!)
Thanks Will! A discussion born out of love is exactly where we're coming from!
So if we work under the pretense that 1) Homosexuality is a sin (no greater than any other sin, but sin none the less)
2)The majority of Homosexuals are not CHOOSING to be gay
Then does this mean they are being forced into sin? Does this equal being born with Original Sin? We are all born sinners, but not everyone is born a murderer or a rapist or a liar, or a sloth, so why is homosexuality so different? Is it just culture that is making it a different "Class" of sin or a different "class" of topic? This also begs the question, can one be homosexual and still be a Christian? If homosexuality is blatently called a sin in Scripture, would a homosexual who considers themselves a Christian be in the same category as someone who calls themselves a Chrisitan, but does not repent from, say, other forms of sexual immorality? Adultary or premarital sex? This is a huge topic!
1) I would say homosexuality is a sin in the sense of purposefully distorting God's creation--Romans 1 describes people who are trying to invent ways to pervert God's glory. That said, all of homosexuality does not fit into that category, so I guess I'm not very comfortable making a blanket statement about homosexuality being sin.
2) As far as not choosing to be gay, the first question plays heavily into this one. Wether it is genetics, or conditioning or some combination of both, being predisposed to homosexuality does not mean you are automatically living in sin. Medically speaking, with my family background, there is a solid chance that I am predisposed to alcoholism. This doesn't make me an alcoholic, but it does influence the way I live my life, especially when it comes to drinking. Similarly, the predisposition to homosexual feelings and identification, does not mean that a person will act out sinfully or that they have no choice when it comes to sin.
3) I believe it is entirely possible for someone to identify themselves as a homosexual and still be in relationship with Jesus. It may happen that, in their relationship with God, he leads a person to commit to not acting out on the emotions and desires they have as a homosexual. I know people in that place. I would have to say, however, that outside of a personal relationship with that person, all I can encourage them to do is pursue Christ. Even if they spend the rest of their life in some level of confusion or mystery with the realities of being homosexual and being a Christ-follower, they can still pursue Christ just as honestly and fully as I can with all my baggage and misunderstandings and sin.
You are in error and sin. Sorry but your tempero-centric notions are in COMPLETE disagreement with 2000 years of Church history.
Truly, the demonic possession of those who 'come out' into the sodomite 'deathstyle' is clearly in evidence.
Were I to move to Durango, I would offer up a liturgy of malediction on you so fast, I'd not even unpack my bags first.
You cannot be homosexual (active) and a Christian. End of story. Boom.
-Fr. John
Frankly, Fr. John, it is far more important to me to follow and honor the teachings of Jesus who embodied God's unfailing love and faithfulness than to pay much attention to 2000 years of church history and tradition.
Jesus made it clear in his sermon on the mount that any person--no matter how depraved or spiritually bankrupt has access to the Kingdom, so I stand by my remarks (and my friends) in saying that they have every right to seek the Kingdom first and let the rest follow.
I can see how this might be lost on you. Your hateful speech and pharasaical tone make it obvious that you are far more interested in slapping people with maledictions than offering them the love of Jesus.
I have about as much tolerance for vindictive and angry Christians as you apparently have for my gay friends.
You're right about one thing, though, you wouldn't have time to unpack your bags in Durango. There are few people in this town who would put up with your hateful bullshit.
BOOM.
Hmmm...I looked up malediction in the dictionary and it said: "See, Chip Johnson." :) By all means Fr. John, maledict away. But I can't help but think it must be very lonely at the top. And...it has also been my experience that the sin with which a person is most angry and outspoken against is the very area... Oh wait: "See, Ted Haggard."
We call ourselves The Strugglers.
We follow Christ and battle our desire for a homosexual relationship because that is what we feel. To do something other is like writing with our non-dominate hand or eating cereal with a knife.
We go to church and hear 7 week sermons on how to have a good marriage and weep when we get home.
We go to single's Bible study and hear people complain about not finding a mate and seethe.
We go to counseling, hours and hours, dig deep, pray hard, and repent, and our struggle follows us like a shadow.
We hear our brothers use words like, "Fag" and "Homo" and we hide away and whisper a vow of silence.
We are not monsters; we are not lepers. We hear the congregation applaud when an alcoholic repents, but we know, that they would withdraw from us and hand us a bell; we would shout Unclean wherever we went.
We see the gay community call us insensitive and cold, unloving and cruel; and we see them hold hands, and have relationships. We see them love and support one another. And we cannot join them because of Christ and we cannot be a part of the Body due to our struggle.
This is our life, our penance of holiness; we are the Strugglers and we cannot change.
Neighbor,
If you were to move to Durango, we would cover you with a liturgy of benediction so fast, we wouldn't give you time to unpack your bags. God sees your pain and there are some parts of the Body that long to embrace you--all of you.
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