Back on the Mountain

This winter, I've had an intersection of two things I am really excited about. In my last post I talked about Eddie and how our church is beginning to reach into the community of people with disabilities. This is largely due to the fact that Jason Uhl (married to Ruthie, for you Salinasites) works with them as a career and their family caretakes for Eddie. Several others in our church have also begun volunteering in respite care for the families of people with disabilities. I have been looking for a way to get involved on some level in this area which leads to it's intersection with something else I've been missing. Our first winter in Durango, I worked at the ski resort (Purgatory)as a ticket checker and snowboarded a ton. Last year, I didn't get to go up to the mountain once because of my schedule. This year, I am getting involved with an organization called Adaptive Sports Association. They are a group that helps people with all kinds of disabilities participate in outdoor sports: river rafting, water skiing, snow skiing, camping, etc. Now that I've completed my training, I can start teaching snowboarding to ASA clients. I'm excited to get to play with people like Eddie, and the fact that I get a free pass for every lesson I give doesn't hurt either!

Olympic Gold

This past weekend, Eddie went to the Special Olympics. I know this because he showed up on Sunday and he couldn’t wait to show off his gold medal for volleyball. Eddie is almost sixty years old, which is pretty advanced for someone with down syndrome. During our worship service, I had him come up and tell us all about it. He told us how much fun he’d had and how he won and got the medal.
There was a man I used to look up to in youth ministry named Mike Yaconelli. In the heyday of the megachurch, Mike used to brag about his church that had never grown in numbers over sixty. He described a church where people often spoke up and asked questions in the middle of sermons…where several people with down syndrome were members and felt right at home in the little church. His great pride for his church and his description of the atmosphere there seemed incongurent to me at the time. People who didn’t know how to sit still or who interrupted the preacher hardly seemed to fit into my idea of excellence and honoring God. I realized on Sunday, how my perspective has changed. I was as proud of Eddie as he was of his gold medal. I am delighted in our church service of twenty-five people. I love the fact that we can move the chairs to face eachother if it benefits our conversation. I love cancelling the normal program every few weeks so we can just have breakfast together. I don’t even mind when Eddie’s friend, Travis visits and yells “scrotum” in the middle of the service.
I think we are honoring God with excellence. I think coming before God and allowing him to shed light on our quirks and inadequacies gives him great joy because that’s where he loves to be—in the place of redemption—in the place of bridging the gap between our fallenness and his perfection. I love our church.
Eddie got a gold medal, but it somehow belongs to all of us.

Key Ingredients to True Community

Over the past few months, we have been talking about what it takes to engineer a culture in our church that reflects the community Jesus taught about and that developed out of his disciples after the resurrection.

My favorite place to look for cues on how the community of believers should operate is the book of Acts. There are a couple key passages in chapters 2 and 4 that describe the community of Christ followers that grew out of Jesus' ministry and sacrifice. There are two elements from these pictures we have been focusing on lately. One is the idea that people seemed to be willing to do whatever they could to take care of the needs of others. The other element is that it seems people's needs were being brought before the community (otherwise they would not have known who/how to help). We have decided that, for us to function as the community of Christ, we must be willing to not only sacrifice for each other, but live with a transparency that enables us to share our needs openly with each other.

Our particular community has no trouble with the concept of helping--even sacrificially. We have seen people making heroic efforts to meet the needs of others and we have seen God multiply what we have to accomplish more than we could have imagined. Where we hit a snag in all this is when it comes to being transparent enough to share our needs in community. There are several barriers to this kind of disclosure: fear of being judged, fear of appearing incompetent, fear of exposing our sin, etc. It has been interesting to see how God has been stretching us as a group in becoming more comfortable with each other. We have had to work hard to establish a trust that we will be responsible with the things others share. We have had to establish a culture that supports the idea that when someone shares a need, we will all embrace it together and submit to what God is willing to do with that need in and through the community.

The results have been fascinating. For one, we have had needs come up that have gone beyond the "baby steps" I envisioned. The first person to put their need on the table was Peggy. She had an extensive back surgery this summer. Her back is fine, but the quad muscle in her leg mysteriously died--it actually atrophied and she had hardly been able to walk well or even stay upright at times. Medically speaking, she could do some things to strengthen the surrounding muscles to compensate, but there was nothing she could do to revive the nerves--they were either going to come back to life, or she was going to have to cope. Needless to say, this was a little bigger than what I had imagined us taking on in easing into this idea of a community coming together around shared needs. I sort of thought we would help pay someone's electric bill or fix a car--this was in a whole new league.

We agreed to take on Peggy's issue as a family. We decided that we would approach God in community, submit to his movement on the issue, and embrace the results together. We prayed that God would heal Peggy's leg. We wanted to see her miraculously healed...but it didn't happen, at least, not like we imagined. The beauty of it, however, is that we had to learn how to cope with disappointment as a community. We came together and agreed, before God, that we were bummed she didn't just get up and start dancing. We continued to pray over the next few weeks and we all felt the frustration of no immediate results. We also celebrated together when, after a few weeks of praying for Peggy, she got the encouraging news that the nerves in her leg were beginning to fire again and the muscle was slowly coming back to life.

Since then, we have had some big stuff come up in our worship together. The pattern seems to be that someone who has a need, shares it with their closest friends, calls me, brings it to their small group, and then they share it in community worship on Sunday. It has been an amazing process of people becoming more comfortable showing up to church and saying, "I didn't want to come today because ______________ is going on in my life, but I wanted you all to be able to pray for me." It's amazing how our first response to hardship is often to keep it a secret until it is "taken care of" and then we want to go to church to share the victory. We are beginning to realize that sharing the victory in community is much sweeter when you have all shared in the struggle and pain from the beginning. In fact, the impression we are getting is that God intends to provide for us and deliver us from the stuff in our lives through community. Maybe that's why followers of Jesus are referred to as the "body of Christ". When God wants to give you a hug, he does it through one of his children. When he wants to provide for your physical needs, he multiplies what one of his people is willing to give to do it. Keeping struggles and needs secret actually blocks God's main means for meeting need!

There's no denying that this is a messy precedent we have set. It means that we can no longer hide the fact that we are broken people who don't "have it together". We can't pretend that everything is ok. We have to embrace the reality that there are heavy and profound problems all around us and that they don't just go away after we pray for the "unspoken request". I am convinced, however, that we have taken a big step toward the picture of community painted in the scriptures. I am also convinced that we are beginning to see what Jesus intended to teach us when he approached people over and over who could not hide their issues and loved them and healed them.

I'll have to talk more in anther post about what it's like to be the leader of this kind of community--"WOW", is all I can say at this point!

Call Me Officer Johnson

Well, not exactly officer...but I do get a cool jacket and a flashlight! I've recently joined a group of volunteers at the sheriff's department called, Victim Services. The main idea is that whenever there is a death where family or friends are involved, the deputies need someone to be with the family/friend while they deal with the actual death scene. I'm looking forward to being able to help and I think it is very insightful for them to want "pastor-types" in this role since we deal with these issues as it is. I am a little anxious about taking on more trauma, but I think it will be worth investing in in our community.

Call Me Mr. Johnson

So, this year I've started working as a substitute teacher at the high school. I've enjoyed it so far. I didn't realize how much I missed being around students. So far, I haven't had any of the usual nightmares that people talk about. I think the "dude, we were so brutal to that sub" memories become embellished over time and we really weren't as bad as we thought we were.

Anyway, I like the job and it's fun to hang out with Jenn during the day when I'm there.

Catching Up...

Ok, here are some nuggets to catch you all up on what's going on here in Durango...

Oscar just started the first grade/Piper started kindergarten

Jennifer is teaching English at the high school this year--she has a great classroom and is on campus so cheerleading is easier and she still has most of her students from last year.

I am about to start working as a substitute at the high school and junior highs--not nearly as glamorous as river guiding, but it'll pay better and I get to be around people!

Steve is doing well in Boston, although I'm sure a big part of his soul is still feeling stretched being so far away. He and Amy seem to be finding a lot of great opportunities to serve in Boston.

Fall is on it's way--the river is low and the trees are about to change colors.

The church is doing some interesting experiments in biblical community: this summer we had an exercise in generosity where we gave almost $2000 away to two local (and unsuspecting) pastors. We are now trying to develop a culture of bringing needs before God and giving sacrificially to help meet them--more on that later.

I almost got to go to Ethiopia and Kenya to train some pastors on small group-based church, but at the last minute another guy decided he wanted to go and I got the boot--don't ask, I'm still a little bitter!

I am personally enjoying a growing relationship with one of the guys in our church. Stephen has been a new friend who is more than up to the challenge of listening to all my philosophizing and can even dish it out (usually sitting by the river with pipes smoldering, of course). So far we have dreamed up some pretty cool stuff including possibly learning to sew and make clothes and building a bicycle-powered generator to run the TV.

I feel like we have officially made the transition to fall and I am looking forward to what this year has in store for CTK Durango and our family.

I'm coming back!

I haven't forgotten about this blog for any of you who stop in from time to time. Summer has been fun and busy--that's a good thing. This week school starts and I'll be back to blogging about life, church, my trip to Africa, and all sorts of things going on here! Stay tuned.

A Great Loss.

A few days ago, I read about a murder in Durango in the paper. As it turns out, it was my friend, Doug. Doug was a homeless man who has been living in a tent up Horse Gulch for about 11 years. I met him at Manna Soup Kitchen when we moved here. We played a lot of cards and talked a bunch. I last saw Doug walking downtown a week or so ago. I can't get my mind around the fact that I didn't stop to talk to him and now he's gone. I wish I could go back and spend a few minutes with my friend.

For those of you who are praying for us here, I would ask you to pray for Doug's family in Texas and for me as I grapple with the tragedy of his passing.

All Forward!

This summer is turning out to be a little different than I had anticipated. The Hummer tour company I have been working for got sold out this year, so I won't be wheeling like I did last year. The good news is I got certified to guide river tours on the river that runs through town. This week I checked out and took my first clients through the rapids. It's been a fun process learning how to navigate the river and I've gotten to know some great people on the crew I work with. It is so amazing to be able to do things like this along with pastoring CTK. Yesterday, one of my fellow guides put it this way, "It's so cool that you're, like, a pastor, but you're a real person".

I'm realizing as well how much being in the water matters to me!

Are We There Yet?!?

Last night we got home from our family road trip to Idaho, via CA. We drove about 3900 miles in two weeks attending Steve's wedding and visiting the Hoffmans in Coeur D'alene, Idaho. We also got to visit Salinas Valley Community Church and see many of our friends from before Durango. Our kids, as it turns out, were born for road-tripping and camping on a road trip is my new favorite thing. I discovered the power of Starbucks Doubleshot, and we got to see Montana which turns out to be one of the most beautiful places I have ever been. The highlights for me were being with Steve the night before the wedding, smoking pipes and blessing he and Amy as well as catching up with the Hoffmans and seeing how they are settling in to Coeur D'Alene. Thank you to everyone who was part of our trip...we had a great time!

End of an Era

Yesterday we said goodbye to Steve. Steve Boutry has been my partner and friend in the CTK Durango journey. We will still be discovering the impact he has had on this ministry for years to come. I will certainly miss our conversations and "what if" talks over the campfire in my back yard. I will also miss his contribution to the teaching in our services and his companionship in leading the Farmington crew. Most of all, Steve has been my friend these past two years. Having said goodbye to so many of my friends in moving here, it is even more difficult to see Steve go. I felt like we were able to honor him yesterday as a community and we are certainly glad for his marriage to Amy. I'm also pretty excited to see what Boston has in store for Steve and Amy. In moving to Boston, Steve is pretty much living out the pattern God has developed in dealing with us in Durango: the "you won't have any idea what it will look like, but I am sending you to ____________" pattern.

Steve, never ask for a picture of the future. Instead, continue to learn how to recognize when you are exactly where God wants you, and may you always be able to say, "this is the best day of my life".

Bring on the Summer!

Most of the snow has finally melted and the wind is dying down, so Durango has turned the corner to summer. Rafters are starting to dot the river and the occasional Jeep tour is heading up the mountain (even though the high trails are still snowed in). Jenn and the kids have one more week of school before vacation. I start guide school (learning to guide raft trips on the river) at the end of this month and the Hummer tour season should start gearing up soon. We are really looking forward to our road trip to California in the beginning of June. We will be in Salinas for Steve's wedding and then head up to Idaho to visit our friends the Hoffmans.
In the mean time, Jenn and I are starting to check out our favorite hiking trails and enjoying the sunshine!

Coach Chip

We are now two weeks away from the end of our six-year-olds soccer season. I somehow ended up as the coach of the Gutheads (if you think that's bad, you should hear the choices that didn't get voted for!) when there was no one stepping up to coach the boys from Oscar's kindergarten class. It's been a lot of fun and I have really enjoyed working with the boys and getting to know the families.

A CTK Wedding

Last night, Ruthie and Jason from our church got married. It was a lot of fun as far as weddings go. The best thing was that it was our first wedding for CTK in Durango. The whole crew was there and it was pretty cool to be part of their story. We are so excited for Jason, Ruthie, Annie, and Jackson--oh, and Eddie too!

How Honest Do We Have To Be?

One of my favorite things about CTK Durango is our honesty and transparency. We "let it all hang out" with each other. I've heard people talking in our worship services saying, "I feel pretty crappy. In fact, I didn't feel like coming today, but I figured, what the hell!" We've shared the good and the bad. It's a cultural reality for us that has shaped the kind of church we've become.

Recently, however, I was confiding in a friend about some of the difficulties we are having as a family and he mentioned that he was surprised to hear about the struggles because everything seems so positive and upbeat on this blog. Part of this is that there are really so many things going well here. The church is thriving in it's own unique and earthy way. We are reaching the people that no one else seems too interested in. On the other hand, I am feeling pretty convicted that I would showcase these amazing things without also being willing to share less attractive and more difficult happenings.

So, here goes...

While the church is thriving and people are connecting in ways I never thought possible, Jennifer and I are struggling to make it financially. This year, Jenn went to work teaching. We have been living off her income along with a $500 monthly stipend from the church. I guess I don't need to put our budget here, but suffice it to say that we are living on a shoe string. We do not have any form of entertainment or clothing or extra-curricular activities in our personal budget. We don't have cable and I just shut down my final luxury--an account with Nexflix. Our housing costs are low for this area. Our mortgage is less than what it would cost us to rent a house. We have done everything we can to cut costs but we are still not able to quite make ends meet. Right now we are running on about a three hundred dollar deficit each month. As far as debt goes, we have one $240 car payment and about $5000 left to pay on debt we accrued over the first year moving to and settling in Durango. On a positive note, in two months, my income from the church will go from $500 to $1000/month which will be helpful.

I'm not sharing any of this to generate sympathy (or donations for that matter). I am fully aware that there are people all around us who are in far worse condition. My goal here is simply to be as honest and authentic as the faith community that has risen around our efforts here in Durango. I feel no sense of entitlement to any level of income or standard of living. I do, however, have some very real concerns about our financial reality--it is a struggle for us, to say the least. If you're still reading, I will close with this: God has been good to us. He has often affirmed what we are doing here and is moving in fantastic ways in this community. I am having some great moments with my wife, and both my kids--almost daily. I am building on new friendships that challenge and inspire me, and I am looking forward to many things in the coming months. It would be less than honest of me, however, keep such close accounts of all these things and not also share the struggles and costs of working for God in such an unorthodox context as this.

Fishing with the Boy

Yesterday I took Oscar fishing for the first time. He's been with me before when I've been fishing, but this was his first time casting and reeling himself. We didn't catch anything, but he learned how to cast (with a real rod and reel) and reel in a spinning lure. We're going out again today. This spring and summer are going to be a lot of fun--Oscar can do so many things now that we will be able to do things together instead of him watching me have fun. If you know me at all, you know that this time of life has been one of my greatest aspirations. To run down to the river in the afternoon with my son casting lines and laughing when he has to poop in a plastic bag because we are too far from the bathroom! This is going to be one of those summers I will wish I could just wrap up and freeze in time.

Easter

We had a fun Easter service this week. The band was huge (for us) with two guitars, a bass player, a drummer and three vocalists! It sounded great. Stephen, who played bass just started showing up with his wife, Amanda--what a great addition they have been to our group.

My grandma is here visiting. It's pretty fascinating to see her responses to what we're doing here. This is a woman who has been going to church for many, many years. She seemed to enjoy herself, although there were times during the teaching when I could see that her eyes were following the tattoos on my arms as they moved around!

Even though we had a good time, every week that goes by is one week closer to Steve leaving. For two guys who don't know how to express emotion very well, we've grown really close over the last couple years. I'm going to miss his friendship, for sure, but what's really going to get to me is losing my partner in audacious church experimentation. I'm not sure I can live without those conversations that start with some random idea and end with, "why not, let's do it". So much of what has turned out to be an amazing movement of God in our community was birthed from a couple of guys who really didn't have much to lose and couldn't be more in love with the idea of Jesus making great things out of our poverty.

Shared Space (update)

Yesterday we had our first gathering in the new building at Matthew's House. There was a great energy there in the new space with everyone there. I'm sure I will eventually get over my aversion to meeting on Sunday mornings...the benefits will outweigh my hesitations, I'm sure.

After our meeting, a group of us met at my house with some of the people from Patrick Crossing for lunch. We talked about the prospect of looking at what it would be like for us to work together as a team in ministry. It was exciting to see people respond to the concept of biblical unity--especially since there aren't many examples of it working well around us. I can't wait to see what this looks like six months from now!

Let's Brag on the Wife!

I talk a lot about what we have going on at CTK, but the truth is, none of what I am doing in shepherding this church would be possible outside the example and hard work of my wife, Jenn.

This year, Jenn took a job at a local "experimental" high school to support our family so we can continue in our work with the church. It's been a tough year, mostly because the school that hired her has been plagued with poor leadership and serves as sort of a dumping ground for Durango's undesirables (not to mention leaving her babies in the care of a guy who only teaches them about cars and cooks mac'n'cheese). In spite of the difficulties, Jenn has proved her worth on the staff and has become one of the most respected and valued teachers there. She has not held back from the kids and has actually been able to speak into their lives in creative and profound ways.

The other thing Jenn is really into this year is coaching cheerleading. She has been coaching since her teaching days at Watsonville High School in California. What's amazing about her efforts here is that when she started coaching the cheerleaders at Durango High a year ago, the team was small and mostly known for their lack of character and poise (to say the least). I just went to the banquet they have at the end of the season and I was blown away by how she has invested in and shaped these girls. She has produced a team of girls who are being recognized by the school leadership as examples of character, integrity, and charisma. They are attending camps and are now starting to enter the realm of competition. This year, in particular, they had an experience where one girl's health struggles had the potential of jeopardizing a homecoming routine they had been working on for months. The team decided to put aside the routine in order to support their teammate. In the end, the team came together, this girl was able to pull through, and they nailed the routine anyway.

I'll spend my life trying to teach people about the value of serving God by serving people. My wife just does it for a living. Who's the pastor now?!?

Shared Space

This coming Sunday, we will be changing venues for our worship service at CTK Durango. This is not too shocking...it was about a year ago that we moved from Pickles Restaurant to the Community Rec Center. Two things are significant about this transition. One is that we will now be meeting on Sunday mornings. Our goal is make ourselves more accessible to people. We want our central worship experience (which we refer to as the "front door") to be as easy to find and safe for people exploring Jesus. The second reason for the move is that we get to share space with other churches. We are moving into the building currently leased by Matthew's House. Joe Beckler (the pastor) and I have become good friends in the past couple years and through that relationship he has extended an invitation for us to share their space. They meet on Sunday nights, so the mornings are wide open. Patrick Crossing (another church--another good friend) will also begin using the space as they meet on Thursday nights. Before long, three churches will be using the same facility. Not only will we be sharing space, but we are constantly exploring new ways for the churches to share in ministry as well. I am intrigued and excited about the prospect of churches doing life together as well as what it communicates to the community about the unity of God's Church (did that all rhyme?)when we can share resources instead of hoarding them.

Lord, Save Us From Your Followers

On Monday night, we teamed up with Patrick Crossing (another church in town) and screened a movie called, "Lord, Save Us From Your Followers" at the Abbey Theatre--picture a small little independent theater with couches in the balcony and a full bar.

The movie basically brings up some of the disparities between Christian culture in America and the life Jesus taught us to live. It was very well done and it sparked some good dialog between Christians and people who would normally too angry at Christians to talk.

The best part for me was a conversation I had with a woman afterward who said she had stopped going to church because it seemed like people were more concerned with being right than actually helping the poor and oppressed. She was really excited about the prospect of finding community with people who worship God and consequently long to reach out to the abandoned people groups with love, acceptance, and forgiveness.

I'm looking forward to where these conversations lead. The movie is supposed to hit theaters this summer, so look for it. It will definitely create some great inroads to conversations about Jesus.

Last night was one of those nights that reminds you of why you're here. I got to kind of cast vision for where we're headed in the coming months. It is an exciting time for us and I can't wait to elaborate in the coming weeks. Suffice it to say that we have a great group of people in this community who are bursting with potential to uncover the Kingdom all over the place!

More to come!

101 Reasons Not To Leave Durango In Winter

This past weekend, Steve, my Dad, and I flew to Seattle for the annual Arrows Out conference for CTK. Once a year, everyone from all the campuses get together in one place. It was so good to catch up with people who I've only been talking to on the phone for the last twelve months. Some highlights were great conversations about the future and focus of CTK Durango/Farmington and a private beer tasting with our supervising pastor, Rick Snodgrass.

Some low-lights were getting bumped from our flight from Seattle to Phoenix, being re-routed to Denver, sitting around the airport watching flights being canceled, spending the night in a hotel only to discover our flight was rescheduled for 24 hours later, renting a car and stretching the six hour drive from Denver to ten hours.

It was a long trip.

We got a ton of snow in Durango while we were gone (hence the travel issues). I finally caught up with the shoveling this morning, so it'll probably snow again tomorrow!

It's good to be home!

Juno--Not Alaska

Jennifer and I went to see the movie Juno last night. This is basically the story of a sixteen year old girl who gets pregnant and the process of dealing with the obvious as well as the relationships around her. The best part of the movie for me, however, had more to do with the four teenage girls sitting behind us.

The movie was adorable, despite the fact that no one wants a kid to have to deal with some of those issues. Several key moments in the movie brought on four simultaneous sighs from the row behind us. With each sigh, you could tell that these girls (I'd guess they were in junior high) were being sucked into the story. They were obviously picturing themselves as the humorously quirky, attractive teenager making the best of being eight months pregnant. You could tell they could almost picture themselves waddling around their school campus, joking with their step mom and chatting with their best friend about gestation and ultrasounds--being pregnant at sixteen was almost cool!

Then came the delivery scene at the hospital. The sighs continued up until the very moment when the baby came out and the nurse held it up--covered in blood and stuff. The rest of us adult-types were quietly taking in the depth of the moment, so the quadruple "eeeeeeeeewwwwaa" from behind us echoed through the room, followed by the instantaneous belly laughter of every woman in the room who had ever given birth.

The movie was really well done. The actress who played Juno, the teenage mother, was fantastic and the theme of the story having to do with the idea that similar interests are far from the foundation of a lasting relationship was well-put. The girls sitting behind us, however, will be why I will always prefer to see a movie in the theater on a crowded Saturday night.

I suppose none of this has much to do with church, however, if you want to get a glimpse of what a culture of authenticity and experiencing life together with real people looks like, Juno actually does a pretty good job. That, or you could show up to the rec center in Durango some Sunday evening and see it for real!

Time To Take Out The Trash

I haven't posted in a while...good to be back!

I recently had a noteworthy conversation with one of our crew from Farmington. We were talking about reaching out to the people who don't get much attention and she described a conversation she had with a woman who is developmentally disabled, but living on her own. They were talking on the phone and Christine (my Farmington friend) asked the woman if anyone was visiting her. The woman's response was, "The Mormons show up sometimes. They want to tell me about God, but they won't take out the trash." In that moment, this woman described the problem with so much of what we call "outreach".

How often do we, as Christians, look at outreach as an event, or even a sport. We think of all the people we want to reach and we start playing a numbers game so we can keep score of how many times we share the gospel. Sometimes (maybe all the time), however, in order to be able to have the opportunity to share the good news about Jesus, we need to be willing to share the good news that we are willing to serve. Taking the time to get to know someone and learning how to serve them can make the difference between sharing/modeling Christ with someone and simply annoying them.

The end of the story is that Christine invited her new friend to lunch (who just so happens to like the $20 shrimp platter at Red Lobster) and was able to help her with some groceries and even tracked down a stroller for her Pomeranian! Good on ya, Chris, for practicing true religion and authentic outreach!