http://web.mac.com/ctkdurango/iWeb/Site/Podcast/Podcast.html
So, we're trying something new at CTK Durango--podcasting. For those of you unfamiliar with the podcast, it is basically a recording posted on the internet. Last night, we started recording the teaching from our worship service to podcast weekly. There are a couple reasons for this leap in technology: one is that we have a couple who is going away for two months and they wanted to be able to keep up with our worship. Another reason is for all of you who are not in Durango who have been supporting us and following our journey.
I hope you enjoy it and we would love to hear your feedback and response to what we have going on. Soon, we will have things set up so you can subscribe to the podcast through iTunes. For the time being, I've included a link to the website.
It's quite possible that we are the only church in America where you can hear kitchen noises in the background of all our teaching (courtesy of Pickles Restaurant)!
http://web.mac.com/ctkdurango/iWeb/Site/Podcast/Podcast.html
Monday, February 26, 2007
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Let it all hang out!
Why is it that the story of many pastors today reads of amazing leadership and dedication and progressive pursuits followed by a catastrophic moral failure that brings it all crashing down over night? Why is it that revealed weakness or real struggle in our spiritual leaders is so shocking and disappointing? Could it be that the church's pursuit of excellence and execution has superceded the values of authenticity and accountability?
Jesus didn't hold it together when he walked into the temple and saw people making money off worship. He didn't act cool when Lazarus was dead. He never pretended it was all good to be crucified. Jesus blew up...he wept...he wondered if there might not be an easier way to do hard things. Jesus' life seems to have been a roller coaster of emotion, improvisation, compassion, empathy, and obedience. I don't read the gospels and see an upward trajectory of increased excellence and execution--I see Jesus responding in the moment every moment. Sometimes he is angry, other times sad or compassionate or abrupt with the truth. He seems to be honest with what he is feeling and experiencing--even if those feelings are not the most effective way to "win people over". He seems to care more about loving people in the midst of life as it happens as opposed to projecting that he is impervious to his surroundings and circumstances.
My greatest hope is that the people in our church understand that my failures often match (and usually immediately follow) my victories. I want them to see that, while I strive to obey God in every moment, how I get there can be sketchy and indirect. I want us to witness and experience a process of transformation as messy and unpredictable as it is God-inspired and beautiful. I understand about disclosure and being appropriate and wise in how we share information. I don't feel compelled to "prove" my brokenness for effect or reaction--I do, however, believe that it is authenticity, more than excellence, that honors God and inspires people. I believe I have done my congregation an incredible disservice if they are shocked to find out that I have real difficiencies and struggles.
I realize that healthy, stable people will probably be turned off by this way of doing business. I suppose in the end I may end up surrounded by only hurting and broken people searching for God in the midst of their complex and unpredictable lives...but I have to ask, is that really such a bad thing?
Jesus didn't hold it together when he walked into the temple and saw people making money off worship. He didn't act cool when Lazarus was dead. He never pretended it was all good to be crucified. Jesus blew up...he wept...he wondered if there might not be an easier way to do hard things. Jesus' life seems to have been a roller coaster of emotion, improvisation, compassion, empathy, and obedience. I don't read the gospels and see an upward trajectory of increased excellence and execution--I see Jesus responding in the moment every moment. Sometimes he is angry, other times sad or compassionate or abrupt with the truth. He seems to be honest with what he is feeling and experiencing--even if those feelings are not the most effective way to "win people over". He seems to care more about loving people in the midst of life as it happens as opposed to projecting that he is impervious to his surroundings and circumstances.
My greatest hope is that the people in our church understand that my failures often match (and usually immediately follow) my victories. I want them to see that, while I strive to obey God in every moment, how I get there can be sketchy and indirect. I want us to witness and experience a process of transformation as messy and unpredictable as it is God-inspired and beautiful. I understand about disclosure and being appropriate and wise in how we share information. I don't feel compelled to "prove" my brokenness for effect or reaction--I do, however, believe that it is authenticity, more than excellence, that honors God and inspires people. I believe I have done my congregation an incredible disservice if they are shocked to find out that I have real difficiencies and struggles.
I realize that healthy, stable people will probably be turned off by this way of doing business. I suppose in the end I may end up surrounded by only hurting and broken people searching for God in the midst of their complex and unpredictable lives...but I have to ask, is that really such a bad thing?
Sunday, February 04, 2007
Going to the Deep End
We have come to an important crossroads in our journey. Part of our process in moving to Durango was to raise enough money for Steve and I (and my family, of course) to live on for about a year. We had several reasons for this. The main reason was to allow ourselves some time to establish this church community at its own pace. We didn't want to equate people showing up with a paycheck. Another reason was that it gave a small group of people an opportunity to partner with us in this project. It has been a beautiful thing to see these people continue to pray for us and support us--for me personally it has helped me not feel so lonely in a new place to have such a great network of friends keeping up with us.
We've come to the place now where we will be able to stretch our financial support for another four or five months. Six months into our work here, some amazing things have happened. We are meeting in a restaurant which has worked well for us--in fact, the owner is thinking of remodeling the area we currently rent to be better suited for our group, opening the door for us to lease it on a more permanent basis (think office space and not hauling equipment every week!). About a third of the people worshipping with us on Sunday nights are locals and they have come to the point where they call CTK their church. One of these women has become involved in our budgeting and marketing and another guy is part of our worship team! We have also grown our small groups to the point where more people are in these groups than show up on Sundays (reflecting our high value on small groups). These are just a few of the exciting things that serve to affirm our decision to come to Durango and now our decision to deepen our commitment.
Jenn and I are in the process of selling our house. We bought it this past summer with the understanding that if we needed to, we could sell it and move to a home we could afford without a mortgage. We figure we can cut our living costs substantially by eliminating the house payment. Jenn is also applying for teaching jobs in the junior highs and high school. A job with the school district would give us much more affordable medical benefits as well as a greater earning potential than I am making working part time at minimum wage. If all this comes together, I will be staying at home with the kids and focusing on pastoring while Jenn teaches. Our goal is basically to be able to live on 25%-50% less than we are now. This would allow us to continue our work with CTK as well as keep to our principles in terms of letting our community grow at its own pace.
I am as confident as ever that we are exactly where we should be and it is exciting to see things developing the way they are. We love Durango just as much as we did six months ago, only now it is more about the precious people God has led to us than the mountains and rivers (even though they are still magnificent!). I am incredibly grateful to all the people who have supported us in this endeavor. Your feedback and friendship have strengthened and encouraged us over the last six months. Steve and I are looking forward to visiting California in May to connect with you all and give a better report of what God is doing here.
We've come to the place now where we will be able to stretch our financial support for another four or five months. Six months into our work here, some amazing things have happened. We are meeting in a restaurant which has worked well for us--in fact, the owner is thinking of remodeling the area we currently rent to be better suited for our group, opening the door for us to lease it on a more permanent basis (think office space and not hauling equipment every week!). About a third of the people worshipping with us on Sunday nights are locals and they have come to the point where they call CTK their church. One of these women has become involved in our budgeting and marketing and another guy is part of our worship team! We have also grown our small groups to the point where more people are in these groups than show up on Sundays (reflecting our high value on small groups). These are just a few of the exciting things that serve to affirm our decision to come to Durango and now our decision to deepen our commitment.
Jenn and I are in the process of selling our house. We bought it this past summer with the understanding that if we needed to, we could sell it and move to a home we could afford without a mortgage. We figure we can cut our living costs substantially by eliminating the house payment. Jenn is also applying for teaching jobs in the junior highs and high school. A job with the school district would give us much more affordable medical benefits as well as a greater earning potential than I am making working part time at minimum wage. If all this comes together, I will be staying at home with the kids and focusing on pastoring while Jenn teaches. Our goal is basically to be able to live on 25%-50% less than we are now. This would allow us to continue our work with CTK as well as keep to our principles in terms of letting our community grow at its own pace.
I am as confident as ever that we are exactly where we should be and it is exciting to see things developing the way they are. We love Durango just as much as we did six months ago, only now it is more about the precious people God has led to us than the mountains and rivers (even though they are still magnificent!). I am incredibly grateful to all the people who have supported us in this endeavor. Your feedback and friendship have strengthened and encouraged us over the last six months. Steve and I are looking forward to visiting California in May to connect with you all and give a better report of what God is doing here.
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