CTK Durango

A New Blog

2010-08-07T14:03:00.002-06:00

I realize it has been a while since I've posted on this blog. It seems that, for a time, the ease and access of Facebook seemed to take priority over posting on a blog.

That being said, I have actually started a new blog. I have taken a Nazarite vow and chose to use the blog format to journal through the experience for the next six months. If you've followed this blog in the past, you may be interested to look up the new one at www.modernnazarite.blogspot.com

If you're father John trolling the internet to lambaste people with your ridiculous admonitions, go ahead and schedule your liturgical malediction--nothing happened last time, so maybe this time you should dance around naked and cut yourself or something.

River of Lost Souls

2009-08-17T17:23:00.003-06:00

When the Spanish came to this area, they named the river they found (obviously not in late August) El Rio De Las Animas Perdidas En Pergatorio--the river of lost souls in purgatory.

This summer, the Animas (as we call it now) earned it's name. At the peak of the season, on a higher than normal water flow, there was a horrible accident on the upper section of our river and a woman died. It was a terrible day for us at the shop and, of course, for our guides and clients on the trip. One of the girls who works in the office had her parents on the trip which made things excrutiating as we waited for news of what happened and who was hurt. Fortunately for my friend, her mother was safe--unfortunately for another family, their mom was gone. In the end, there was nothing that could have been done differently on the trip. There were two EMTs, a nurse, two combat veteran Marines, and an ER doctor on the trip who, collectively, were not able to save her.

While the accident was terrible and it had a profound effect on our entire company and the family involved, it was a moment that I will forever point to as indicative of why I am doing what I am doing in Durango and how I long for CTK to develop and be characterized. Here's why:

1. I was at the shop when we heard that someone had died. No one, in the whole process, who works for that company would have ever thought of calling a church and asking if a pastor would be willing to hang out with them and help them cope with what was happenning. I was there. I was already part of the community. There was a level of trust already established.

2. When the clients and guests finally got back to Durango I was asked to go to the train station to meet with everyone and help people find a place to stay and cope with the immediate realities of what had happened. In the words of one of my co-workers, "If that happened to me I would want pastor Chip to be there"!

3. I was there when my friend (who's mother was on the trip) came down from everything and just needed someone to hug her and tell her it was ok to be relieved her mother was safe even though it meant someone else was grieving a horrible loss.

4. I had dinner with the rest of the clients that night and was able to pray for them and offer help.

5. The Sheriff's office asked me to be their representative in helping the raft company staff deal with the tragedy because of my background as a pastor and the fact that I work for the company and know everyone.

6. Over the next couple weeks following the accident, I had almost every single person involved in the accident as well as the other guides at the shop approach me and ask to talk or bring up questions they had about the whole ordeal. I was asked several times if I would pray for people.

7. When I had a difficult time digesting what had happened I was able to commiserate with my co-workers who understood what I was going through and appreciated the fact that these things affect "preachers" too!

Not one of these things would have happened if I was sitting in my church office that day writing a sermon. Even if someone had called me as a "pastor" to come and help, I would not have had the inroads or time to be able to really connect with any of those kids. I grieve the loss from that accident. I also look to that experience as evidence that, while God doesn't always stop bad things from happenning, he is in the business of redemption. God redeemed the moment by having me in that place at that time in authentic relationship with those people.

If anyone ever asks me why I believe in bi-vocational ministry...if anyone ever asks me why I believe in relational evangelism, this is why.

Prayer Letter

2009-05-14T23:40:00.004-06:00

I remember when I was a kid living in South America, we had to send out prayer letters. These letters were designed to let people know what was going on in the mission field. It seems like for my whole childhood we had these letters laying around from other missionaries. I liked them because they often had pictures and the back side was blank which meant I got to draw on them too.

This summer, when the new brochure came out for the rafting company I work for I was pleasantly suprised to see that my mug shows up in their pictures of guides. My first thought was, "this is my prayer letter!" It's a little under cover, but I think it's kind of funny that my prayer letter for the mission I'm on in Durango for the summer is distributed throughout town in various racks for people to pick up at their leisure. So, if you happen to pick one up, pray for me and the time I get to spend with one of my favorite groups of people--raft guides!

The Down Side

2009-05-01T23:22:00.002-06:00

I'm discovering that there is a down side to the kind of leader I find in myself. I feel that I have been called to lead in weakness and brokenness those who will not be led by strength and competency. The theory is that there are people who need a leader who has answers--someone who will direct wtih confidence and demonstrate the strength to move forward when no one else can. There are others, however, who have been hurt by over-confident or downright arrogant leadership. These people have experienced pain. They are looking for leaders who will identify with them at the level of their hurt and are suspicious of anyone who seems to have it all together or who has too many easy answers.

The problem with leading out of brokenness is that, sometimes, it is not a philosophical choice of leadership style, but a simple reality of life. I am broken and weak. I have these glaring shortcomings and uncertainties that affect me. I am no scholar. I wish I knew more scripture and spent more time with it. My prayer is often disjointed and scattered and when confronted with these realities, I wonder if I am doing a disservice to the people I have been entrusted to lead. I ask God to send them a new leader--a better one who has some answers--some plan to lead them out of and away from pain.

This is when I come full circle in my thinking. Becoming strong and competent will not make me a better leader to the hurt and broken. It would make me inaccessible and "other". My only option is to lean into Jesus. I have to beg him to reach into the hearts of the people I care so much about. I ask him over and over not to forget them and not to let my weakness keep me from bringing them to his attention.

Maybe, having so little hope in my own ability to compensate for people is not such a bad thing. Maybe, what I need and what I wish for are at odds. I wish that I could be stronger and, therefore, be able to carry the people God has entrusted to me. What I need is to see that these are actually God's people and the reality that I need to trust him to keep and care for them is just that--reality. I wonder if humble and contrite intercession isn't, maybe, the best kind of intercession.

Hmm.

Passion Play

2009-04-11T13:38:00.000-06:00

This week I went to the local Passion play with my mom. I wasn’t going to go, but decided to because my dad had a big part in the play and I wanted to see him with his hair down and glasses off. I have nothing against the play itself, but I find myself these days attending less and less traditional church events.

As I sat there, I became more and more uncomfortable. This event was, of course, a very concerted effort on the part of the churches involved (including people from ours) to reach people with the message of Jesus. For some reason, however, I felt weird--like I didn’t belong there. It wasn’t the people--they were friendly and genuine. The actors were sincere and I could tell they were there for the best possible reasons. It was me. There was something about me that felt wrong in that place. I thought about how long it had been since I’d been in a church building (the place we meet doesn’t have the same feel as a normal church along with the fact that we only meet there now once a month), and I began to reflect on my life and relationships.

I spend less than an hour a week--if that--in my church office. In fact, if you went in there, the only evidence that I have anything to do with that office is a small book shelf in the corner with the hat I inherited from my grandpa that says, “if you ain’t chicano, you ain’t caca.” I don’t have a staff, so there are no staff meetings. I work more hours at The UPS Store than I do for the church (I get paid far less--nothing--for the church work as well). When I hear my kids answering the question “what does your dad do?“ I hear them say I’m a raft guide or a substitute teacher. My weekly spiritual interactions consist of a small group that meets in my house and a bizarre group of guys who meet in a bar to talk about the Kingdom on Wednesday afternoons. Most of the people I am around throughout the week are not church people--James, my homeless friend, angry people at the UPS Store who think that as a cashier I have some secret plan to rip them off on their shipping needs, raft guides, coffee shop people, elementary school parents, neighbors, etc. The phone number for our church in the yellow pages is the number to my cell phone. Once a month, if that, I get a call that has to do with the church--usually asking if we’re the false prophets who use the devil’s NIV version of the Bible, or demanding that we change our name because the Lutheran church had it first. When I meet with a couple who want me to do their wedding, I get to share Jesus with them, but I don’t get to tell them what they need to do with any authority because I’m just the preacher, not any person of authority in their lives. The people in our church community are different than any church people I’ve ever known. Our conversations are more about things going on in their life outside church than things that happened at a service or something I said when I was preaching. The people in our church have all experienced some pretty deep levels of pain--much of it self-inflicted and a lot of it out of our control.

As I thought through my life as a pastor, it become harder to identify it as the life of a pastor as I‘ve understood it in the past. In fact, as I sat there watching the youth group kid in front of me trying to put a piece of duct tape down the front of a girl’s shirt, a sickening sensation began to swell in my stomach. “What if I’m no longer really a pastor?” What if I’m doing it all wrong? Am I living out some weird pseudo-pastoral fantasy? Could I be leading this group of people way down the wrong path away from what God has clearly established as the way of doing church? I began to have a little panic attack in my seat--until a roman guard ran by me complete with plastic helmet and surfer sandals.

I came out of my head for a moment and was able to watch the play for a while. My dad was a high priest trying to plot the murder of Jesus. I watched as Jesus cried out to God in the garden, was arrested, and then nailed to the cross.

I continued to think about what I thought being a pastor was supposed to be like. My friend, Joe recently asked me if I had written down what I thought God’s calling on my life was. He said it would be good to have it written down to go back to when I had doubts about what I was doing. Since this was definitely one of those moments, I walked through, in my mind, the ideas I had been thinking of in terms of what God was asking me to do here in Durango.

There is a phrase that’s been going through my mind when I think of what God has called me to do in my life and here in Durango. My calling, as I see it, is to lead in poverty and weakness those who will not be led by strength and competency. There are people in the world who need a strong leader to guide them. They need pastors who will take the reigns with confidence and lead them where God wants them to go. These people are looking for leaders who know where they are going and how to get there. They want to hear what the plan is and then follow that plan--success is making a decision, following through with that decision and seeing it happen the way it was envisioned. There is another kind of person in the Church, however. Often, this other brand of Christian has been hurt by their past church experiences. They’ve been abandoned or betrayed by confident and driven leaders. Sometimes, they have been told that they don’t measure up to standards of excellence, or that their struggles and shortcomings were too much for that particular community. These people have a difficult time with strength and confidence. They are turned off by anyone who appears to have it all together or knows all the answers.

This is where I come in.

I have no doubt in my mind that God has gifted me as a leader and as a shepherd of people. It is as much a part of my DNA as anything. The problem is that I am extremely relational and emotional. I don’t fit the profile of a typical pastor. I’m not driven to excellence--I like to do a good job, but the experience is often more important to me than the goal. I don’t command decisions and follow through with them--I try things. I often try things that don’t work out the way I intended, and yet, God always seems to accomplish something in the midst of my imperfection and weakness. I am discovering that there is a section of society that is looking for this kind of leader--my kind of leadership. They want to know that their pastor is their friend and that he is more interested in their heart than their behavior. They need a shepherd who will walk with them through weakness and failure and not abandon them when they blow it or fall short. These people are not hard to find--they just aren’t at church. Many of them have been on hiatus from going to church for quite some time, or have quit altogether. They tend to struggle with the idea that God doesn’t love them because he doesn’t seem interested in miraculously delivering them from their problems.

As I continued to tune in and out of the Passion play I realized why I felt strange in the church world I had grown up in. It wasn’t because there was anything wrong with Passion plays, or youth groups, or traditional church--or me. It was because I have been designed for and called to reach out to a group of people who exist outside that sphere of reality. They are being left behind and abandoned or disqualifying themselves from church altogether. I’m not just called to be with those people, I am one of them. I don’t fit in that world. I’ve been hurt by it. I don’t fit it’s standards of leadership. I don’t go about business in the same way. The things I keep telling my people about how God can meet them even outside the “normal” church goes for me as well.

I watched Peter run into the empty tomb and listened as he sang a song I had heard for the first time as a small boy. I smiled as I remembered Speedy Ramirez singing “He’s Alive” in the Easter pageants at the church we went to when I was a kid. I had come to a good place--fully appreciating, both the excitement of the church presenting Jesus’ resurrection in such a creative way and my own reality as the bastard preacher with the strange assignment in God’s upside down Kingdom. At the time, I didn’t even know that, 24 hours later, I would be sitting in a sweat lodge praying with an accompaniment of Native American chants and drumming--fully completing the picture of what it means for Chip Johnson to be a pastor.

New Adventures in Church Experimentation

2009-04-02T14:56:00.000-06:00

In the midst of economic upheaval and difficult times for many people, our church community at CTK Durango is doing some really cool stuff! When our budget tanked in January, we realized there wasn’t going to be an easy solution. Several of the families in our church were/are dealing with extremely challenging financial realities. Recovering financially as a church wasn’t going to be a matter of people digging deeper.

The first question we asked ourselves (it seems like we ask a lot of questions--more than we have answers, usually!) was, What does the church do in a time like this? We decided we could do one of two things: we could disband and have every man fend for himself and come back together when things were better, or we could come together and see if God would be willing to work in and through us as a community to move forward. Naturally, none of us wanted to be sissies, so, scared as we were, we decided to come together and seek God’s direction. In this process over the last couple months, we have seen God really come through for the people in this church. No instant fixes, or outrageous resolutions, but more an experience in life amidst difficulty. We’ve seen great movements in generosity, gratitude, and grace (the g thing was accidental, I promise!). We’ve seen people making room to take care of the people around them and God has used this family of believers to reach out to the people around us--even when circumstances are not ideal! We’ve also had the opportunity to experiment with church.

Our conversations over the past several months have led us in an interesting direction as a church. We started talking about worship. The question was, What if my attitude about worship was more about what I bring to God in community and less about what God and community have for me? Our conclusion was that we each bear the responsibility of worship and the result was a renewed attitude of focusing on God in our worship meetings and taking the focus away from ourselves. We defined worship as acknowledging God for who he is out of our brokenness and gratitude--as a community of Christ-followers.

It wasn’t long before we felt the need to carry this movement of worship to the people around us. We asked, How do we communicate this idea of worshipping God in brokenness and gratitude to the people around us in Durango? We concluded that focusing on authentic relationships was extremely important to moving our life of worship out of the church meeting and into the community. This presented us with somewhat of a dilemma: how do we strike a balance between worshipping God in community and building meaningful relationships with the people God wants to reach without simply trying to get people to attend church. We’ve decided against church attendance as a primary means of evangelism because we’ve noticed that there isn’t really enough opportunity at a worship meeting for us to get to know each other better, let alone new visitors.

We have recently begun to experiment with new ways to accomplish our goal of worship and reaching out. We retrofitted our small groups to become teaching groups. We decided they would meet for six weeks at a time with a focus on different teaching material--theology, Bible study, biblical world-view, etc. By meeting for a limited period of time, we would give people a chance to get to get to know each other as well as the opportunity to meet others as the groups mix and change over time. We are also trying a different way of doing Sunday Worship. Instead of meeting weekly, we are meeting once a month for community worship. This leaves us with the weekends in between Sunday Worship to develop meaningful relationships with the people we work and live with who might never “attend church”. It has been fascinating to see how people are using this free space to develop relationships. Personally, I have already spent time getting to know people from inside and outside our church community that simply wasn’t possible before. We are encouraging people to go camping and have bbqs and invite friends over for dinner or go to shows late on Saturday night!

Time will tell whether or not this works for us. So far, the biggest complaint has been, “I miss meeting regularly” which rarely means they miss preaching and stuff so much as the regular time spent with people--something I think they will value over time when they realize the possibilities for creative time spent together outside of the context of a church service.

So, this is pretty much what we have going on right now at CTK Durango. The last thing I want to talk about now to catch this blog up completely is the idea of calling and what I am discovering as a pastor on the topic, but that’ll be another post.

By the way, thank you to all of you who have been tracking with us and praying for us. I hope to keep better connected to you all now that we’re all caught up!

Getting up to speed

2009-04-02T14:54:00.000-06:00

I can always tell when I’ve become lax in my blogging when Will sends me a message pleading for a new post. It’s more than a simple desire for good reading material for Will. He knows that, as a pastor, missionary, or whoever, staying out of touch could easily mean that things are really hectic, or that you are burning yourself out, or that you can’t think of a positive spin for your readers on crappy life circumstances. In response to this welcome accountability, then, I will try to catch you all up with how life has been for us over the past few months. In my next post, talk about church stuff--this is the family stuff.

In January, our church was hit with the financial issues the rest of you are all facing as well. We didn’t bring in nearly what we had budgeted and immediately blew through our savings, etc. The immediate action I was forced to take was to cut my salary completely and trim what was left of the bills. This left our family with a 40% cut in income over night. Since we were already on a tight budget, we had to think creatively. We were already in the process of refinancing our house to pay off some debt and take advantage of the better rates, so we decided to follow through with that. The down side of the refi was that it took about three months to go through (gone are the days of stated income!), which caused us considerable stress. I had recently begun to work for a couple in our church at the UPS Store (no, I can’t tell you off the top of my head how much it will cost to ship your dog overnight to North Carolina). We also decided to try and sell Jenn’s car. Since it was new and paid for, we saw it as our only asset. In the end, after driving it to CA and back to try and sell, we ended up just keeping it anyway--great blessings on Mick Longley who put in many hours trying to help us sell the car only to have me come and take it back!

As I write this, looking back, it does not seem all that bad! I can assure you, however, it was pretty stressful for us! It was exhausting trying to figure out what to do to make ends meet. The refinance process was grueling as every time we met requirements, the bank decided they wanted something else from us. In all, I made three marathon non-stop drives to CA which worked me over in the sleep department--Starbucks double shots and audio books literally saved my life!

When the refinance finally went through and I had paid off all our debt but one car payment and the house, thought we were going to get a chance to breathe a little. That brought us to about a week ago when Jenn found out that she was not going to have her teaching contract renewed at the high school.

As things stand now, we are too exhausted to panic which has probably been the greatest blessing so far.
Jenn and I sat down and decided that, not only do we not have the energy to freak out about this new development, but we wanted to choose to respond differently. We looked back at the past 14 years of our marriage and saw that we have been in situations like this on many occasions. Not only have we been through times like this, but God has always been faithful to us--we’ve always appreciated where we end up more than the place we were before. We’ve always had food to eat and a roof over our heads. We have always had good community and precious family around us. In short, we’ve decided that our best guess (and therefore what we will choose to expect) is that God will only continue in his pattern of provision and we can simply wait for him to show us where to focus our energy.

Jenn has one potential job prospect in a new program starting at the high school. I can continue working at the UPS Store and have just been offered more hours if I want them. The church is slowly getting back on it’s feet and I am expecting to be able to draw some sort of pay from it four or five months.

Blessings: There is a lot to be thankful for in the midst of this hectic season…
We are debt free--besides a car payment and our mortgage, we were able to get rid of all credit card debt which frees up our cash flow a little and helps us feel a little less “tied down”.
My job at the UPS Store is a welcome provision. There is nothing like being the pastor preaching a sermon on Sunday and then being berated by an angry customer who is being forced to spend all their eBay earnings on shipping on Monday! My hours there will also still allow me to guide raft trips a little this summer.
Jennifer took her competition cheer squad to the national competition in LA and they took3rd in their division. To put this in perspective, the team that took first had gone to ten competitions this year to prepare for the national event--Nationals was the third competition ever for Jenn’s girls!
There is some really cool stuff going on with church which I’ll talk about later
My sister has made some amazing progress in her recovery. I think AA is one of the best vehicles for Christ to impact people ever and I’m so proud of her for working hard and not giving up. It has been good to have her in town and get to spend time with her. In our adult life, I have not ever been close enough to her to be able to grab breakfast or coffee. I love it.
My brother and I are staying in touch even though he is still in CA working for Google. I am incredibly proud of his success there and am enjoying having a relationship with him as well.
Oscar and Piper are amazing little beings. OJ and I have almost made it through the entire Star Wars series of movies and he is proving to be a good Padawan. Piper is an artist--I love her spirit and we often sit in coffee shops and draw pictures in these weird stream of conscious doodle conversations.
I love my wife. Jenn has proven to be a fantastic partner and a great mom. I love the way she takes care of our kids. She spends hours reading to them and teaching them how to be good humans--which really balances out the bizarre ways I have been twisting their minds!
I have some good friends. There are guys I have in my life who I can smoke pipe with and ponder the universe as well as men who I can make myself accountable to and a great group of guys who meet for “Pub Church” every week to discuss matters of the Kingdom--beer in hand.
To top it all off, I’ve managed to lose about 35lbs over the last couple months (no in any unhealthy way) which makes me feel much healthier and hasn’t hurt my love life either!

Anyway, this should catch everyone up on the life stuff for us. I’m excited to get you all up to speed on the church stuff too!

Benediction

2009-02-12T07:43:00.003-07:00

I recently had an interesting experience. Someone out in internet-land found a blog post I'd written in May of 2007 about being gay in church. The basic jist of the post was that we had decided, as a church, to love people first and worry about behavior second. We were choosing relationship and allowing God's Spirit to lead people beyond that.

Apparently, Fr. John took great offense to my stance on homosexuality. I wasn't so surprised that someone might disagree with my thoughts so much as I was floored by how he responded. He threatened me with a liturgy of malediction. In the middle ages, a liturgical malediction was where a group of monks got together and described in graphic detail how they wanted God to afflict someone they were unhappy with. I don't know if Fr. John was calling out boils on my body or just making a point. In any case, it ocurred to me that such a thing as malediction exsits. A benediction is a blessing. Often, at the end of a worship experience, the pastor will speak a blessing on the congregation--you might also extend a benediction to someone as you try and encourge them in pain, or intercede on their behalf before God. I am amazed that there would be people out there who would see a use for the antithesis of benediction.

As this has been sinking in with me, the concept of benediction has become increasingly important. As a pastor (and all of us as Christ-followers) I cannot affford to waste time not blessing people. I must use every connection and influence I carry with God to extend his blessing to the people around me. Not only because I know God longs to bless people through me, but now, because I am aware that there are people out there, calling themselves Christians, who would employ the anti-benediction in an effort to curse and confound anyone who doesn't agree with them.

So...God bless you all!

The Office

2009-01-28T21:16:00.002-07:00

Every once in a while, I realize that it has been several weeks since I have set foot in my church office. This usually occurs to me as I walk into the Irish Pub and the kids working there yell, "Pastor Chip!".

Back on the Mountain

2008-12-11T07:36:00.003-07:00

This winter, I've had an intersection of two things I am really excited about. In my last post I talked about Eddie and how our church is beginning to reach into the community of people with disabilities. This is largely due to the fact that Jason Uhl (married to Ruthie, for you Salinasites) works with them as a career and their family caretakes for Eddie. Several others in our church have also begun volunteering in respite care for the families of people with disabilities. I have been looking for a way to get involved on some level in this area which leads to it's intersection with something else I've been missing. Our first winter in Durango, I worked at the ski resort (Purgatory)as a ticket checker and snowboarded a ton. Last year, I didn't get to go up to the mountain once because of my schedule. This year, I am getting involved with an organization called Adaptive Sports Association. They are a group that helps people with all kinds of disabilities participate in outdoor sports: river rafting, water skiing, snow skiing, camping, etc. Now that I've completed my training, I can start teaching snowboarding to ASA clients. I'm excited to get to play with people like Eddie, and the fact that I get a free pass for every lesson I give doesn't hurt either!

Olympic Gold

2008-11-12T16:17:00.002-07:00

This past weekend, Eddie went to the Special Olympics. I know this because he showed up on Sunday and he couldn’t wait to show off his gold medal for volleyball. Eddie is almost sixty years old, which is pretty advanced for someone with down syndrome. During our worship service, I had him come up and tell us all about it. He told us how much fun he’d had and how he won and got the medal.
There was a man I used to look up to in youth ministry named Mike Yaconelli. In the heyday of the megachurch, Mike used to brag about his church that had never grown in numbers over sixty. He described a church where people often spoke up and asked questions in the middle of sermons…where several people with down syndrome were members and felt right at home in the little church. His great pride for his church and his description of the atmosphere there seemed incongurent to me at the time. People who didn’t know how to sit still or who interrupted the preacher hardly seemed to fit into my idea of excellence and honoring God. I realized on Sunday, how my perspective has changed. I was as proud of Eddie as he was of his gold medal. I am delighted in our church service of twenty-five people. I love the fact that we can move the chairs to face eachother if it benefits our conversation. I love cancelling the normal program every few weeks so we can just have breakfast together. I don’t even mind when Eddie’s friend, Travis visits and yells “scrotum” in the middle of the service.
I think we are honoring God with excellence. I think coming before God and allowing him to shed light on our quirks and inadequacies gives him great joy because that’s where he loves to be—in the place of redemption—in the place of bridging the gap between our fallenness and his perfection. I love our church.
Eddie got a gold medal, but it somehow belongs to all of us.

Key Ingredients to True Community

2008-10-24T08:58:00.004-06:00

Over the past few months, we have been talking about what it takes to engineer a culture in our church that reflects the community Jesus taught about and that developed out of his disciples after the resurrection.

My favorite place to look for cues on how the community of believers should operate is the book of Acts. There are a couple key passages in chapters 2 and 4 that describe the community of Christ followers that grew out of Jesus' ministry and sacrifice. There are two elements from these pictures we have been focusing on lately. One is the idea that people seemed to be willing to do whatever they could to take care of the needs of others. The other element is that it seems people's needs were being brought before the community (otherwise they would not have known who/how to help). We have decided that, for us to function as the community of Christ, we must be willing to not only sacrifice for each other, but live with a transparency that enables us to share our needs openly with each other.

Our particular community has no trouble with the concept of helping--even sacrificially. We have seen people making heroic efforts to meet the needs of others and we have seen God multiply what we have to accomplish more than we could have imagined. Where we hit a snag in all this is when it comes to being transparent enough to share our needs in community. There are several barriers to this kind of disclosure: fear of being judged, fear of appearing incompetent, fear of exposing our sin, etc. It has been interesting to see how God has been stretching us as a group in becoming more comfortable with each other. We have had to work hard to establish a trust that we will be responsible with the things others share. We have had to establish a culture that supports the idea that when someone shares a need, we will all embrace it together and submit to what God is willing to do with that need in and through the community.

The results have been fascinating. For one, we have had needs come up that have gone beyond the "baby steps" I envisioned. The first person to put their need on the table was Peggy. She had an extensive back surgery this summer. Her back is fine, but the quad muscle in her leg mysteriously died--it actually atrophied and she had hardly been able to walk well or even stay upright at times. Medically speaking, she could do some things to strengthen the surrounding muscles to compensate, but there was nothing she could do to revive the nerves--they were either going to come back to life, or she was going to have to cope. Needless to say, this was a little bigger than what I had imagined us taking on in easing into this idea of a community coming together around shared needs. I sort of thought we would help pay someone's electric bill or fix a car--this was in a whole new league.

We agreed to take on Peggy's issue as a family. We decided that we would approach God in community, submit to his movement on the issue, and embrace the results together. We prayed that God would heal Peggy's leg. We wanted to see her miraculously healed...but it didn't happen, at least, not like we imagined. The beauty of it, however, is that we had to learn how to cope with disappointment as a community. We came together and agreed, before God, that we were bummed she didn't just get up and start dancing. We continued to pray over the next few weeks and we all felt the frustration of no immediate results. We also celebrated together when, after a few weeks of praying for Peggy, she got the encouraging news that the nerves in her leg were beginning to fire again and the muscle was slowly coming back to life.

Since then, we have had some big stuff come up in our worship together. The pattern seems to be that someone who has a need, shares it with their closest friends, calls me, brings it to their small group, and then they share it in community worship on Sunday. It has been an amazing process of people becoming more comfortable showing up to church and saying, "I didn't want to come today because ______________ is going on in my life, but I wanted you all to be able to pray for me." It's amazing how our first response to hardship is often to keep it a secret until it is "taken care of" and then we want to go to church to share the victory. We are beginning to realize that sharing the victory in community is much sweeter when you have all shared in the struggle and pain from the beginning. In fact, the impression we are getting is that God intends to provide for us and deliver us from the stuff in our lives through community. Maybe that's why followers of Jesus are referred to as the "body of Christ". When God wants to give you a hug, he does it through one of his children. When he wants to provide for your physical needs, he multiplies what one of his people is willing to give to do it. Keeping struggles and needs secret actually blocks God's main means for meeting need!

There's no denying that this is a messy precedent we have set. It means that we can no longer hide the fact that we are broken people who don't "have it together". We can't pretend that everything is ok. We have to embrace the reality that there are heavy and profound problems all around us and that they don't just go away after we pray for the "unspoken request". I am convinced, however, that we have taken a big step toward the picture of community painted in the scriptures. I am also convinced that we are beginning to see what Jesus intended to teach us when he approached people over and over who could not hide their issues and loved them and healed them.

I'll have to talk more in anther post about what it's like to be the leader of this kind of community--"WOW", is all I can say at this point!

Call Me Officer Johnson

2008-10-10T08:24:00.003-06:00

Well, not exactly officer...but I do get a cool jacket and a flashlight! I've recently joined a group of volunteers at the sheriff's department called, Victim Services. The main idea is that whenever there is a death where family or friends are involved, the deputies need someone to be with the family/friend while they deal with the actual death scene. I'm looking forward to being able to help and I think it is very insightful for them to want "pastor-types" in this role since we deal with these issues as it is. I am a little anxious about taking on more trauma, but I think it will be worth investing in in our community.

Call Me Mr. Johnson

2008-09-16T17:51:00.002-06:00

So, this year I've started working as a substitute teacher at the high school. I've enjoyed it so far. I didn't realize how much I missed being around students. So far, I haven't had any of the usual nightmares that people talk about. I think the "dude, we were so brutal to that sub" memories become embellished over time and we really weren't as bad as we thought we were.

Anyway, I like the job and it's fun to hang out with Jenn during the day when I'm there.

Catching Up...

2008-09-02T21:36:00.002-06:00

Ok, here are some nuggets to catch you all up on what's going on here in Durango...

Oscar just started the first grade/Piper started kindergarten

Jennifer is teaching English at the high school this year--she has a great classroom and is on campus so cheerleading is easier and she still has most of her students from last year.

I am about to start working as a substitute at the high school and junior highs--not nearly as glamorous as river guiding, but it'll pay better and I get to be around people!

Steve is doing well in Boston, although I'm sure a big part of his soul is still feeling stretched being so far away. He and Amy seem to be finding a lot of great opportunities to serve in Boston.

Fall is on it's way--the river is low and the trees are about to change colors.

The church is doing some interesting experiments in biblical community: this summer we had an exercise in generosity where we gave almost $2000 away to two local (and unsuspecting) pastors. We are now trying to develop a culture of bringing needs before God and giving sacrificially to help meet them--more on that later.

I almost got to go to Ethiopia and Kenya to train some pastors on small group-based church, but at the last minute another guy decided he wanted to go and I got the boot--don't ask, I'm still a little bitter!

I am personally enjoying a growing relationship with one of the guys in our church. Stephen has been a new friend who is more than up to the challenge of listening to all my philosophizing and can even dish it out (usually sitting by the river with pipes smoldering, of course). So far we have dreamed up some pretty cool stuff including possibly learning to sew and make clothes and building a bicycle-powered generator to run the TV.

I feel like we have officially made the transition to fall and I am looking forward to what this year has in store for CTK Durango and our family.

I'm coming back!

2008-08-17T16:35:00.003-06:00

I haven't forgotten about this blog for any of you who stop in from time to time. Summer has been fun and busy--that's a good thing. This week school starts and I'll be back to blogging about life, church, my trip to Africa, and all sorts of things going on here! Stay tuned.

A Great Loss.

2008-07-16T20:32:00.002-06:00

A few days ago, I read about a murder in Durango in the paper. As it turns out, it was my friend, Doug. Doug was a homeless man who has been living in a tent up Horse Gulch for about 11 years. I met him at Manna Soup Kitchen when we moved here. We played a lot of cards and talked a bunch. I last saw Doug walking downtown a week or so ago. I can't get my mind around the fact that I didn't stop to talk to him and now he's gone. I wish I could go back and spend a few minutes with my friend.

For those of you who are praying for us here, I would ask you to pray for Doug's family in Texas and for me as I grapple with the tragedy of his passing.

All Forward!

2008-06-20T08:26:00.002-06:00

This summer is turning out to be a little different than I had anticipated. The Hummer tour company I have been working for got sold out this year, so I won't be wheeling like I did last year. The good news is I got certified to guide river tours on the river that runs through town. This week I checked out and took my first clients through the rapids. It's been a fun process learning how to navigate the river and I've gotten to know some great people on the crew I work with. It is so amazing to be able to do things like this along with pastoring CTK. Yesterday, one of my fellow guides put it this way, "It's so cool that you're, like, a pastor, but you're a real person".

I'm realizing as well how much being in the water matters to me!

Are We There Yet?!?

2008-06-16T07:29:00.002-06:00

Last night we got home from our family road trip to Idaho, via CA. We drove about 3900 miles in two weeks attending Steve's wedding and visiting the Hoffmans in Coeur D'alene, Idaho. We also got to visit Salinas Valley Community Church and see many of our friends from before Durango. Our kids, as it turns out, were born for road-tripping and camping on a road trip is my new favorite thing. I discovered the power of Starbucks Doubleshot, and we got to see Montana which turns out to be one of the most beautiful places I have ever been. The highlights for me were being with Steve the night before the wedding, smoking pipes and blessing he and Amy as well as catching up with the Hoffmans and seeing how they are settling in to Coeur D'Alene. Thank you to everyone who was part of our trip...we had a great time!

End of an Era

2008-05-19T17:16:00.002-06:00

Yesterday we said goodbye to Steve. Steve Boutry has been my partner and friend in the CTK Durango journey. We will still be discovering the impact he has had on this ministry for years to come. I will certainly miss our conversations and "what if" talks over the campfire in my back yard. I will also miss his contribution to the teaching in our services and his companionship in leading the Farmington crew. Most of all, Steve has been my friend these past two years. Having said goodbye to so many of my friends in moving here, it is even more difficult to see Steve go. I felt like we were able to honor him yesterday as a community and we are certainly glad for his marriage to Amy. I'm also pretty excited to see what Boston has in store for Steve and Amy. In moving to Boston, Steve is pretty much living out the pattern God has developed in dealing with us in Durango: the "you won't have any idea what it will look like, but I am sending you to ____________" pattern.

Steve, never ask for a picture of the future. Instead, continue to learn how to recognize when you are exactly where God wants you, and may you always be able to say, "this is the best day of my life".

Bring on the Summer!

2008-05-12T10:39:00.002-06:00

Most of the snow has finally melted and the wind is dying down, so Durango has turned the corner to summer. Rafters are starting to dot the river and the occasional Jeep tour is heading up the mountain (even though the high trails are still snowed in). Jenn and the kids have one more week of school before vacation. I start guide school (learning to guide raft trips on the river) at the end of this month and the Hummer tour season should start gearing up soon. We are really looking forward to our road trip to California in the beginning of June. We will be in Salinas for Steve's wedding and then head up to Idaho to visit our friends the Hoffmans.
In the mean time, Jenn and I are starting to check out our favorite hiking trails and enjoying the sunshine!

Coach Chip

2008-05-05T13:09:00.003-06:00

We are now two weeks away from the end of our six-year-olds soccer season. I somehow ended up as the coach of the Gutheads (if you think that's bad, you should hear the choices that didn't get voted for!) when there was no one stepping up to coach the boys from Oscar's kindergarten class. It's been a lot of fun and I have really enjoyed working with the boys and getting to know the families.

A CTK Wedding

2008-04-27T18:08:00.002-06:00

Last night, Ruthie and Jason from our church got married. It was a lot of fun as far as weddings go. The best thing was that it was our first wedding for CTK in Durango. The whole crew was there and it was pretty cool to be part of their story. We are so excited for Jason, Ruthie, Annie, and Jackson--oh, and Eddie too!

How Honest Do We Have To Be?

2008-04-12T13:41:00.008-06:00

One of my favorite things about CTK Durango is our honesty and transparency. We "let it all hang out" with each other. I've heard people talking in our worship services saying, "I feel pretty crappy. In fact, I didn't feel like coming today, but I figured, what the hell!" We've shared the good and the bad. It's a cultural reality for us that has shaped the kind of church we've become.

Recently, however, I was confiding in a friend about some of the difficulties we are having as a family and he mentioned that he was surprised to hear about the struggles because everything seems so positive and upbeat on this blog. Part of this is that there are really so many things going well here. The church is thriving in it's own unique and earthy way. We are reaching the people that no one else seems too interested in. On the other hand, I am feeling pretty convicted that I would showcase these amazing things without also being willing to share less attractive and more difficult happenings.

So, here goes...

While the church is thriving and people are connecting in ways I never thought possible, Jennifer and I are struggling to make it financially. This year, Jenn went to work teaching. We have been living off her income along with a $500 monthly stipend from the church. I guess I don't need to put our budget here, but suffice it to say that we are living on a shoe string. We do not have any form of entertainment or clothing or extra-curricular activities in our personal budget. We don't have cable and I just shut down my final luxury--an account with Nexflix. Our housing costs are low for this area. Our mortgage is less than what it would cost us to rent a house. We have done everything we can to cut costs but we are still not able to quite make ends meet. Right now we are running on about a three hundred dollar deficit each month. As far as debt goes, we have one $240 car payment and about $5000 left to pay on debt we accrued over the first year moving to and settling in Durango. On a positive note, in two months, my income from the church will go from $500 to $1000/month which will be helpful.

I'm not sharing any of this to generate sympathy (or donations for that matter). I am fully aware that there are people all around us who are in far worse condition. My goal here is simply to be as honest and authentic as the faith community that has risen around our efforts here in Durango. I feel no sense of entitlement to any level of income or standard of living. I do, however, have some very real concerns about our financial reality--it is a struggle for us, to say the least. If you're still reading, I will close with this: God has been good to us. He has often affirmed what we are doing here and is moving in fantastic ways in this community. I am having some great moments with my wife, and both my kids--almost daily. I am building on new friendships that challenge and inspire me, and I am looking forward to many things in the coming months. It would be less than honest of me, however, keep such close accounts of all these things and not also share the struggles and costs of working for God in such an unorthodox context as this.

Fishing with the Boy

2008-03-25T12:56:00.004-06:00

Yesterday I took Oscar fishing for the first time. He's been with me before when I've been fishing, but this was his first time casting and reeling himself. We didn't catch anything, but he learned how to cast (with a real rod and reel) and reel in a spinning lure. We're going out again today. This spring and summer are going to be a lot of fun--Oscar can do so many things now that we will be able to do things together instead of him watching me have fun. If you know me at all, you know that this time of life has been one of my greatest aspirations. To run down to the river in the afternoon with my son casting lines and laughing when he has to poop in a plastic bag because we are too far from the bathroom! This is going to be one of those summers I will wish I could just wrap up and freeze in time.

Easter

2008-03-25T12:40:00.004-06:00

We had a fun Easter service this week. The band was huge (for us) with two guitars, a bass player, a drummer and three vocalists! It sounded great. Stephen, who played bass just started showing up with his wife, Amanda--what a great addition they have been to our group.

My grandma is here visiting. It's pretty fascinating to see her responses to what we're doing here. This is a woman who has been going to church for many, many years. She seemed to enjoy herself, although there were times during the teaching when I could see that her eyes were following the tattoos on my arms as they moved around!

Even though we had a good time, every week that goes by is one week closer to Steve leaving. For two guys who don't know how to express emotion very well, we've grown really close over the last couple years. I'm going to miss his friendship, for sure, but what's really going to get to me is losing my partner in audacious church experimentation. I'm not sure I can live without those conversations that start with some random idea and end with, "why not, let's do it". So much of what has turned out to be an amazing movement of God in our community was birthed from a couple of guys who really didn't have much to lose and couldn't be more in love with the idea of Jesus making great things out of our poverty.

Shared Space (update)

2008-03-17T09:36:00.003-06:00

Yesterday we had our first gathering in the new building at Matthew's House. There was a great energy there in the new space with everyone there. I'm sure I will eventually get over my aversion to meeting on Sunday mornings...the benefits will outweigh my hesitations, I'm sure.

After our meeting, a group of us met at my house with some of the people from Patrick Crossing for lunch. We talked about the prospect of looking at what it would be like for us to work together as a team in ministry. It was exciting to see people respond to the concept of biblical unity--especially since there aren't many examples of it working well around us. I can't wait to see what this looks like six months from now!

Let's Brag on the Wife!

2008-03-12T13:01:00.002-06:00

I talk a lot about what we have going on at CTK, but the truth is, none of what I am doing in shepherding this church would be possible outside the example and hard work of my wife, Jenn.

This year, Jenn took a job at a local "experimental" high school to support our family so we can continue in our work with the church. It's been a tough year, mostly because the school that hired her has been plagued with poor leadership and serves as sort of a dumping ground for Durango's undesirables (not to mention leaving her babies in the care of a guy who only teaches them about cars and cooks mac'n'cheese). In spite of the difficulties, Jenn has proved her worth on the staff and has become one of the most respected and valued teachers there. She has not held back from the kids and has actually been able to speak into their lives in creative and profound ways.

The other thing Jenn is really into this year is coaching cheerleading. She has been coaching since her teaching days at Watsonville High School in California. What's amazing about her efforts here is that when she started coaching the cheerleaders at Durango High a year ago, the team was small and mostly known for their lack of character and poise (to say the least). I just went to the banquet they have at the end of the season and I was blown away by how she has invested in and shaped these girls. She has produced a team of girls who are being recognized by the school leadership as examples of character, integrity, and charisma. They are attending camps and are now starting to enter the realm of competition. This year, in particular, they had an experience where one girl's health struggles had the potential of jeopardizing a homecoming routine they had been working on for months. The team decided to put aside the routine in order to support their teammate. In the end, the team came together, this girl was able to pull through, and they nailed the routine anyway.

I'll spend my life trying to teach people about the value of serving God by serving people. My wife just does it for a living. Who's the pastor now?!?

Shared Space

2008-03-11T08:27:00.002-06:00

This coming Sunday, we will be changing venues for our worship service at CTK Durango. This is not too shocking...it was about a year ago that we moved from Pickles Restaurant to the Community Rec Center. Two things are significant about this transition. One is that we will now be meeting on Sunday mornings. Our goal is make ourselves more accessible to people. We want our central worship experience (which we refer to as the "front door") to be as easy to find and safe for people exploring Jesus. The second reason for the move is that we get to share space with other churches. We are moving into the building currently leased by Matthew's House. Joe Beckler (the pastor) and I have become good friends in the past couple years and through that relationship he has extended an invitation for us to share their space. They meet on Sunday nights, so the mornings are wide open. Patrick Crossing (another church--another good friend) will also begin using the space as they meet on Thursday nights. Before long, three churches will be using the same facility. Not only will we be sharing space, but we are constantly exploring new ways for the churches to share in ministry as well. I am intrigued and excited about the prospect of churches doing life together as well as what it communicates to the community about the unity of God's Church (did that all rhyme?)when we can share resources instead of hoarding them.

Lord, Save Us From Your Followers

2008-02-27T11:30:00.002-07:00

On Monday night, we teamed up with Patrick Crossing (another church in town) and screened a movie called, "Lord, Save Us From Your Followers" at the Abbey Theatre--picture a small little independent theater with couches in the balcony and a full bar.

The movie basically brings up some of the disparities between Christian culture in America and the life Jesus taught us to live. It was very well done and it sparked some good dialog between Christians and people who would normally too angry at Christians to talk.

The best part for me was a conversation I had with a woman afterward who said she had stopped going to church because it seemed like people were more concerned with being right than actually helping the poor and oppressed. She was really excited about the prospect of finding community with people who worship God and consequently long to reach out to the abandoned people groups with love, acceptance, and forgiveness.

I'm looking forward to where these conversations lead. The movie is supposed to hit theaters this summer, so look for it. It will definitely create some great inroads to conversations about Jesus.

2008-02-18T09:21:00.003-07:00

Last night was one of those nights that reminds you of why you're here. I got to kind of cast vision for where we're headed in the coming months. It is an exciting time for us and I can't wait to elaborate in the coming weeks. Suffice it to say that we have a great group of people in this community who are bursting with potential to uncover the Kingdom all over the place!

More to come!

101 Reasons Not To Leave Durango In Winter

2008-02-05T12:04:00.000-07:00

This past weekend, Steve, my Dad, and I flew to Seattle for the annual Arrows Out conference for CTK. Once a year, everyone from all the campuses get together in one place. It was so good to catch up with people who I've only been talking to on the phone for the last twelve months. Some highlights were great conversations about the future and focus of CTK Durango/Farmington and a private beer tasting with our supervising pastor, Rick Snodgrass.

Some low-lights were getting bumped from our flight from Seattle to Phoenix, being re-routed to Denver, sitting around the airport watching flights being canceled, spending the night in a hotel only to discover our flight was rescheduled for 24 hours later, renting a car and stretching the six hour drive from Denver to ten hours.

It was a long trip.

We got a ton of snow in Durango while we were gone (hence the travel issues). I finally caught up with the shoveling this morning, so it'll probably snow again tomorrow!

It's good to be home!

Juno--Not Alaska

2008-01-20T08:17:00.000-07:00

Jennifer and I went to see the movie Juno last night. This is basically the story of a sixteen year old girl who gets pregnant and the process of dealing with the obvious as well as the relationships around her. The best part of the movie for me, however, had more to do with the four teenage girls sitting behind us.

The movie was adorable, despite the fact that no one wants a kid to have to deal with some of those issues. Several key moments in the movie brought on four simultaneous sighs from the row behind us. With each sigh, you could tell that these girls (I'd guess they were in junior high) were being sucked into the story. They were obviously picturing themselves as the humorously quirky, attractive teenager making the best of being eight months pregnant. You could tell they could almost picture themselves waddling around their school campus, joking with their step mom and chatting with their best friend about gestation and ultrasounds--being pregnant at sixteen was almost cool!

Then came the delivery scene at the hospital. The sighs continued up until the very moment when the baby came out and the nurse held it up--covered in blood and stuff. The rest of us adult-types were quietly taking in the depth of the moment, so the quadruple "eeeeeeeeewwwwaa" from behind us echoed through the room, followed by the instantaneous belly laughter of every woman in the room who had ever given birth.

The movie was really well done. The actress who played Juno, the teenage mother, was fantastic and the theme of the story having to do with the idea that similar interests are far from the foundation of a lasting relationship was well-put. The girls sitting behind us, however, will be why I will always prefer to see a movie in the theater on a crowded Saturday night.

I suppose none of this has much to do with church, however, if you want to get a glimpse of what a culture of authenticity and experiencing life together with real people looks like, Juno actually does a pretty good job. That, or you could show up to the rec center in Durango some Sunday evening and see it for real!

Time To Take Out The Trash

2008-01-17T10:45:00.000-07:00

I haven't posted in a while...good to be back!

I recently had a noteworthy conversation with one of our crew from Farmington. We were talking about reaching out to the people who don't get much attention and she described a conversation she had with a woman who is developmentally disabled, but living on her own. They were talking on the phone and Christine (my Farmington friend) asked the woman if anyone was visiting her. The woman's response was, "The Mormons show up sometimes. They want to tell me about God, but they won't take out the trash." In that moment, this woman described the problem with so much of what we call "outreach".

How often do we, as Christians, look at outreach as an event, or even a sport. We think of all the people we want to reach and we start playing a numbers game so we can keep score of how many times we share the gospel. Sometimes (maybe all the time), however, in order to be able to have the opportunity to share the good news about Jesus, we need to be willing to share the good news that we are willing to serve. Taking the time to get to know someone and learning how to serve them can make the difference between sharing/modeling Christ with someone and simply annoying them.

The end of the story is that Christine invited her new friend to lunch (who just so happens to like the $20 shrimp platter at Red Lobster) and was able to help her with some groceries and even tracked down a stroller for her Pomeranian! Good on ya, Chris, for practicing true religion and authentic outreach!

New Digs

2007-12-10T10:07:00.000-07:00

We just moved into our new office this weekend. We're moving for a couple reasons. One is that we have more space now for less money. Another is that we get to be across the hall from CJ and Sheila with Patrick Crossing--a similar ministry in town. CJ has been a real friend and mentor to me over the past several months. It will be good to have access to these guys--especially this summer when I lose my office-mate!

One of the best parts of the move is that I can look out my window to Smelter Mountian (one of the coolest hikes ever!) and room 222 of the Strater Hotel where Louis L'Amour wrote many of his books.

We've Seen Too Much!

2007-11-27T12:26:00.000-07:00

To add to the previous post, I think there is one other perspective we are aiming for at CTK Durango and Farmington. Having our witness of Christ come from our own experience is paramount to reaching the people around us with the Good News.

The "other half" of our witness, I believe, is illustrated in a story in the book of Acts. As Peter and John are going into the temple to worship, a crippled beggar asks them for money. Instead of giving him cash, they heal him! They literally tell him to get up, then help him up and all go inside the temple together. The response of the church leadership is to arrest Peter and John. They don't know what to do with them since the crippled guy is standing there next to them. Finally, they decide to play the heavy with Jesus' disciples. They tell Peter and John that they can leave, but they must never preach or teach in the name of Jesus again. Peter and John basically respond by saying, "after what we've seen God do in the name and under the authority of Jesus, we couldn't possibly stop preaching his Good News.

If you are living in relationship with Jesus, the authority with which you preach the Good News comes from your personal experience with him--like the blind guy Jesus healed. There are times, however, when you are experiencing crisis, or catastrophe, or things just aren't going well. It sounds a little strange to people when your husband just died to be talking about the miraculous things God is doing in your life. Sometimes, we don't have something current to point to in terms of God transforming us--we are in process. It is at these times when I believe the testimony of the maturing Christ-follower is to say, "I don't know what's going on right now, but I've seen too much to not trust God to walk with me through this."

Our goal right now, is to live in balance (tension, maybe) between these two attitudes toward Christ. We either share from the experience of transformation and healing God has extended to us, or we are modeling faith in light of those things we've experienced in the past. The Christian who embraces and lives out these concepts will be miles ahead of the person who "knows" everything there is to know about God.

We Should All Be Blind Guys.

2007-11-19T07:27:00.000-07:00

I've been spending a lot of time recently thinking about the idea of witness--using our story to share the Good News. Growing up in church and going to Christian colleges, I've had my share of training on how to share the gospel--all the different reasonings and arguments.

I know that if you filled the state of Texas two feet deep with silver dollars, marking one with an X, the odds that some random guy would wade into it and randomly pick the same coin are the same as the odds that one man could fulfill eight of the many prophecies in the Old Testament about the Messiah.

I've heard compelling evidence for the scientific possibility of Noah actually fitting all the necessary animals on the ark to survive a flood.

I haven't heard much about talking snakes, so Adam and Eve still confuse me to some extent.

All this to say that as fascinating and compelling as some of these ideas are, I'm not so sure they are very effective in leading someone to a place where they meet Jesus. The more I think about it and look at the Word, the more convinced I am that a relationship with God is less about learning his "stuff" and more about meeting him.

Jesus healed a guy who was blind. The guy really didn't even know who Jesus was. We know this because the religious leaders grilled him and his parents forcefully to try and figure out who healed him, how, and with what authority. Finally, the guy blurts out, "I don't know who he was or what authority he has, but yesterday I was blind and now I can see!"

How do you argue with that? What use does it serve to question his theology? Can you further convince this man of his new ability to see by revealing to him the secrets of the true age of this young earth?

At CTK, we are trying to make a move toward being blind guys--or, I guess, ex-blind guys. In our culture in Durango, there is a lot of spiritualism and a lot of compelling intellectia (is that a word?). There are a ton of smart people with good arguments to support their opinions and conclusions. I wonder what a bunch of former blind guys who have been healed by Jesus, even before they know all about him, could do in a culture like that? Maybe we'll find out.

Experiencing the Power of Prayer

2007-10-23T10:55:00.000-06:00

Oscar started stuttering during the summer. We figured it had something to do with anticipating a new school year--starting kindergarten. Our basic tactic was to not bring attention to it and see what happened. Once school started, the stuttering got worse. After a couple weeks, though, things seemed to settle down and he was able to find his words again. Oscar has been doing really well academically and socially at school. You can tell he is about to break into the world of reading and he really loves to learn. He's also found a few good friends and seems to get along well with most of the kids at school.

This is why a week or so ago, we became concerned when the loss of words seemed to come back--with a vengeance. It wasn't so much that he was stuttering, but you could tell it was really bothering him. It was almost like he was being oppressed or held down by some weight, which is hard as a parent and especially tough with a kid who is pretty introverted to begin with. Last week, Jenn and I had been talking about some of the things we've seen God doing around us and while I was in Farmington for the worship service, it occurred to her to pray for Oscar. I'm a little embarrassed that this didn't occur to us sooner, but there's not a lot I can do about that! Anyhow, Jenn prayed for Oscar and you could instantly see a difference. It was as if something had been lifted from him. He spoke clearly (even on the phone to tell me what happened) and his entire countenance improved. For the past several days, we've continued to pray with him every morning, asking God to help him find his words and give him the peace he needs to be able to relax in his talking. He still gets caught up sometimes in what he's saying, but the amazing thing to me is the difference in his spirit. He seems more calm and less "turned in" on himself.

The best thing about this for me is the fact that Oscar has always been our thinking kid. The whole concept of God as been a little strange to him and he's always hesitated to pray (in fact, he still doesn't like to pray out loud). I love the fact that God had mercy on us and met the boy in a very real and very tangible way. Whatever Oscar does from here on out in his faith and relationship with God, he will always be able to remember a time when God moved in a big way in his life. It inspires me to seek God out in my own life as well.

Settling Down

2007-10-15T09:37:00.000-06:00

Things are starting to settle down a bit for our family. Jenn is getting a rhythm at school and developing relationships with the kids. Oscar just celebrated his sixth birthday (we had a couple kids over and carved pumpkins), and Piper walks around all day saying she loves you to "bits and pieces". I'm even gaining some equilibrium as my mom has offered to take the kids to school M-W-F which gives me a little margin in the morning to do work. It's good to see the kids feeling more secure and Jenn and I are able to communicate more and bring each other down less.

I also bought a car. After ten years of living by the philosophy of, "I'd rather fix it than make a payment" I finally caved and decided I'd rather have a payment than spend my life under a car on the side of the road. I opted for wisdom over ego and ended up with a Mitsubishi Outlander (imagine a minivan and a station wagon having a baby). It's a good car, but by no means what I am used to. I'm realizing that part of my comfort level with driving kids to school and buying groceries has had a lot to do with the fact that I still drove a badass Jeep. Now that that's been stripped away, I'll have to find my identity in something more appropriate.

Church is going great. Last night we had Food Night (can you guess what happens there?). I love just hanging out with our community "on God's time". There is no sermon or program we could launch that could ever legitimize relationship like a food night! Farmington is going well too. We are about to start some small groups out of the main worship that's been happening on Wednesday nights. It's pretty neat to have these guys coming to me saying, "hey, we're ready to start some small groups!"

Family Camp

2007-10-07T11:51:00.000-06:00

This weekend Jenn and I took the kids to Moab, UT to go camping. Moab is about three hours away in the red desert of Utah. It is a beautiful place with massive red cliffs and tons of natural arches. It's pretty much the next mecca for mountain biking, off-roading, and river activities after Durango (maybe before Durango depending on who you ask). We had a great time checking out the town and looking for future camping spots. The highlight was our trip through Arches National Park. The place was a mind-bending overload of desert rock scenery. I can't wait to go back.

The Good, The Bad, and now for some Ugly

2007-10-02T09:47:00.000-06:00

It's been a few weeks, now, since school has started. The kids are doing well. Oscar is adjusting to kindergarten and Piper loves her preschool. Jenn and I are still struggling with our transitions. The logistics and administration are not going well at her school which is a new program this year. Teacher morale is extremely low and the students are pretty under motivated, to say the least. Add to this the change from being with the kids all day long to only seeing them in the evenings and things begin to get a little muggy. She's handling all this with grace and doing a good job of surviving work and making good use of her time with the kids in the afternoons. It is difficult to watch. I would much rather be going through the stressful stuff myself than have to watch Jenn suffer.

We decided to go this route so that I could continue to pastor our campuses when there is not enough funding to support us. This arrangement allows me to work my office hours around school schedules and not be required to work another job part time. I guess the bottom line is that we've chosen a difficult path. I believe we made a good decision, but it is going to be a tough year.

Day 1: Farmington

2007-09-21T10:58:00.000-06:00

Wednesday night we had our first meeting in Farmington, NM. A few of the guys from Durango came and led worship which was cool. We had about sixteen people there which is encouraging after last year when one single person came to our first Durango meeting (and she only came to explain to us how evil the NIV version of the Bible is).

We talked about acceptance, love, and forgiveness. Actually, we talked mostly about acceptance through the eyes of Levi and the notorious sinners who had dinner with Jesus. I think the sixteen people there that night are set to reach out to Farmington with the acceptance that Jesus modeled. We are quite the group of ragamuffins, but I think that's what will make this campus effective.

It will be exciting to see how things develop over the next few months.

A Thought On Scattering Seed...

2007-09-17T09:21:00.000-06:00

In our staff meeting this last week, we had an interesting conversation about evangelism. We were talking about different methods of sharing the gospel and complaining about some that we didn't think were very effective. It got me to thinking about Jesus' parable of the seeds. In Jesus' story, a farmer scatters seed in a bunch of different places...thorny soil, rocky soil, the path, and good soil. The parable basically describes the process of sharing God's love and how different people respond to the Message.

This parable has taken on new significance to me recently. I've often become excited about some new way of sharing Christ and equally as animated about evangelism that I don't agree with or like. One of my greatest frustrations has always been with guilt or death motivated evangelism. I can't bear to watch Kirk Cameron brow-beat some poor guy on the street until he agrees that he's scum. Of course, there is truth to Kirk's method--we are scum. We've all sinned and fallen short of God's glory. I believe, however (you may see a pattern in my posts here) that what you win people with is what you win them to. If you spend all your energy convincing someone how horrible they are (as if we need someone to point out where we fall short!), the faith they live out will be one of always looking over their shoulder wondering if their salvation ever really took or if God is going to give up on them because they keep sinning. On the other hand, if you introduce someone to Christ through his love and sacrifice, the next thought on a person's mind is how unworthy they are of that kind of love which leads to the idea of grace. This person will live out their faith with a sense of God's acceptance for them. Seeking forgiveness will become a matter of reconciling relationship as opposed to "settling accounts" with God.

This is where the farmer sowing seeds comes in. In Jesus' story, the farmer seems to be walking around throwing seeds all over the place. Some of it doesn't get off the path, some goes in the thorns, etc. What if the farmer chose a fertile setting, plowed the ground, planted the seeds purposefully, and then irrigated the field? He might experience a more effective harvest. This is not to say that Jesus' farmer was mistaken, lazy, or incompetent. Sharing the message of God's love is a beautiful thing in any form--inspired by love. Too many people never even go as far as the farmer scattering seeds. Fewer people, however, go one step further to purposefully bringing Christ into fertile places, taking the time to build relationships and trust and model the gospel as well as share it. Too many of us are so anxious to seal the deal, we end up throwing seed out that only gets picked up by the birds a minute later. In my opinion, using a Sunday church service as a faith community's primary form of evangelism is scattering seed. How one man speaking for 37 minutes can say what a thousand people need to hear is beyond me. It seems to me that the Christian friends and families of the thousand people would have a better shot at knowing what they need than the one preacher. Of course, being a preacher, I believe there is evangelistic as well as other kinds of profound value to preaching, but is the sermon or the Sunday service, for that matter, the best place to put all our evangelistic energy?

This is a motivating thought to me. I want to be sure I am sowing seed where it will be most effective. I suppose the bad end of this spectrum of thinking would be to "withhold" the gospel from someone we imagine will not be receptive, but I'm not sure that's a good enough argument to not be purposeful in how we go about communicating the great mystery of God's love.

Countdown to Farmington

2007-09-13T10:01:00.000-06:00

Next Wednesday, we start our new Farmington, NM campus! I'm pretty excited and everyone seems to be working hard to get things ready. Music is pretty much the only thing we really don't have, but it has been amazing to see some old guitars and keyboards being dug up to give it a try. I absolutely love our Farmington crew. I can see people doing what they are gifted and empowered to do and I can only assume this means God has some big intentions for this new community.

This last Sunday night, we got to commission Melissa and Christine, two of our key leaders in the new campus. It was so fun to pray for them and see the Durango group embrace these new leaders.

World Speed Record For Bad Day

2007-08-29T12:26:00.000-06:00

Learning how to be the "stay at home--while working in an office--and driving Hummer tours" Dad is definitely presenting it's challenges. I love the time I spend with the kids. Piper and I, in particular, are getting to hang out a lot in the office--days full of coloring pictures, picnics on the floor, and designing tiaras on the My Little Pony website.

This morning, however, was not fun. I've been having trouble getting Oscar to school by 8am. Today I was stressed out because we didn't have any groceries, so I was sending the boy to school with no lunch (of course I was going to bring him one later). On the way down the hill, we stopped to help our neighbor who was broken down on the side of the road. This set us back a little, but we made our way to Starbucks (did I mention we didn't have any breakfast food either?). With school only a mile away and only two minutes late, I was feeling pretty good about myself. I pulled up in front of the school ready to get on with the day only to find a police car stopped behind me with his lights on. Admittedly, I was driving 30mph in what I thought was a 25mph zone, however, kind officer Murphy informed me that during school hours the limit is 20mph putting me a heinous 10mph over the legal limit. The officer was kind enough to let me walk Oscar to his classroom while he wrote me up.

Needless to say, this took all my emotional energy and coping skills to manage myself--not to mention meriting the all-time speed record for ruining a day before 8am (actually, it says 802am on my ticket)!

What you win them with...

2007-08-19T11:14:00.000-06:00

This flyer was stuffed in my front door this morning.

It may not be completely clear in the pictures, but it is a flyer advertising a competition at a local church to win a gameboy. It's not clear if this is for children or anyone, but the idea is that if you show up and do well in the competition, you will win a video game. My favorite part is where it says you get 10 points for wearing church clothes!

I do have a point (besides just thrashing on the flyer). This is what people who equate numbers of attenders with church success call a "growth engine". A growth engine is an event or series of programs designed to get people in the door of a church in hopes of netting new attenders, and therefore, new Christians. I have two problems with growth engines (besides the silly corporate terminology birthed out of businesses trying to sell stuff):

1) "What you win them with is what you win them to" Ironically, I think I got that phrase from the same organization that taught me about growth engines. The idea (in a church context) is that the methods you reach people with are the same things they will look to later for their continued spiritual growth. In this case, people who show up to win a gamebooy with their church clothes (10 points) and their neighbor (30 points) are going to see church as a competition. How do you explain to "Jonny Gameboy" that salvation is a free gift through Jesus and we don't have to accumulate points to win his grace? Now, I'm not saying you shouldn't have the world's largest banana split at Sunday School. All I'm saying is that is not a good evangelism tool.

2) My second problem with this growth engine tactic is that, besides the name of the church (which I tried to black out), you wouldn't know that this is a church event. There is nothing on this flyer indicating the ultimate purpose for getting these kids to show up, which to me, is and underhanded and basically dishonest way of getting people to church. This church, in my opinion, has shown their greatest priority to be getting people to show up, followed closely by illustrating the church as a place to earn points for great prizes, and somewhere after all that (my guess is at the end of the campaign when the kids will get bonus points for bringing their parents to church) Jesus.

This may seem petty and mean to you. You might be thinking that I am a bitter and jealous guy (probably some disgruntled pastor who can't get more than 30 people to show up to his worship services). You might think I'm being a little hard on a church who is just trying to reach out to their community. Well, Jesus' harshest words always seemed to be reserved for church people who's priorities were out of whack, and somehow, Jesus managed to have kids all over him and, as far as I know, never gave away a gameboy in his life. It seems to me that his authentic love for them was somehow attractive--to everyone.

Stuff I See Everyday...

2007-08-13T20:44:00.001-06:00

I recently got to snap a bunch of pictures on the trails around here. Enjoy!

We're Expanding!

2007-08-06T20:35:00.000-06:00

For quite some time now, we've had a small contingent of people commuting from Farmington, NM (about an hour) to CTK Durango. A couple months back, I started a small group that met in one of the families' homes during the week. We've come to the point where they are really beginning to share their experiences and love for God with the people around them in Farmington...the only problem is it is a lot to ask someone to drive an hour with you to worship. So, starting in the middle of September, we are going to evolve our small group in Farmington into a Cafe-level worship center. We're going to meet in a Spa/Billiards shop (I'll get pictures, but for now imagine a building that totally beats Pickles in the character department!). Part of this transition will mean advertising the new location, starting about three more small groups in Farmington, and me teaching there on Wednesdays in addition to Sundays in Durango.

Of course I'm excited about the prospect of becoming more available to people in Farmington, but the greatest thing about this new development are the people who are chomping at the bit to reach out to their community. I am really enjoying the process of them taking ownership and running full speed with this!

On a personal note, things are heating up a little at home looking toward the fall. Jenn starts teaching on the 15th of this month (August) and the kids start school the week after that. I will be shuttling kids around to their various schools and classes. Jenn is a little anxious about getting back in the classroom after about six years and I am still trying to squeeze another six to eight weeks out of this tour season with the Hummer (oh, and start a new CTK campus in Farmington). We are looking forward to some much needed help from family and friends as well as some good old fashioned godly grace as we navigate this next season!

The Wedding Preacher

2007-07-29T08:13:00.000-06:00

I've been asked to do more weddings in the past few months than in the last several years. My favorite thing about people getting married is that it is an easy line to draw from how we feel about each other to how much God loves us.

The dilemma I've faced a few times now is when I am approached by people who are not part of our church community (or any church community, for that matter). They are not asking my permission to be married, but they do want a pastor to officiate. Usually, during our conversation they communicate to me that, even though they don't have a vital or consistent relationship with God, they still want his blessing and want him to be part of their union.

This brings up an interesting spiritual dilemma. In Romans 1, Paul talks about the fact that no one is without excuse when it comest to knowing God, because there is enough evidence of him out there that everyone has the opportunity to seek him...and if we seek him, he will reveal himself to us. I believe that a wedding can be one of those moments where someone who is mostly irreligious will suddenly be seeking God--and I believe God is not only pleased by this, but will reveal himself to them.

The conversations I've had with people wanting to get married have been the most grace-filled, God-centered, and peace-delivering conversations I could hope for. Couples seem to leave with a sense that God loves them, even if they haven't been going to church or being "religious".

I could be wrong about this, but I've come to the conclusion that I would rather build a bridge between two people and God and establish a relationship with them myself than play the role of one more religious person who invalidates their love and commitment by denying them God's presence in their wedding.

Camping with the Boy.

2007-07-17T09:45:00.000-06:00

Yesterday afternoon, Oscar and I decided to go camping. We live about eight miles from our pick of over 20 campgrounds in the La Plata Mountains. We had a great time except that the raccoons got in the Jeep and ate our breakfast during the night. We hiked around and threw rocks in the creek. I am really enjoying the time I get to spend with Oscar these days. He is about to turn six and I am realizing that five and six were when I began to do things I can still remember. I remember my first A's game with my dad and grandpa, and pretending to be asleep at my desk in kindergarten so I wouldn't have to dance around the classroom.

We decided to leave the tent and stuff in the back of the Jeep so we can go back the next time we have a free evening! I hope these will be things he remembers for the rest of his life.

Hooray for Baptisms!

2007-07-09T16:41:00.000-06:00

Yesterday we had our first baptism! Peggy (Jenn's mom) got baptized in the river yesterday afternoon. It turned out really well. I was a little apprehensive about the freezing cold water, but it wasn't that bad. It was a great moment and a big milestone for our church.

Catching Up

2007-07-06T09:20:00.000-06:00

It's been a while since I posted here...mostly because Hummer tour season is in full swing, so office time is scarce. Here are a few random thoughts to catch you up on what's going on in DGO:

-Sunday we have our first baptisms (in the freezing cold river).

-Last weekend I performed the first-ever Hummer tour wedding in the La Plata Mountains.

-Oscar has to be one of the only 5 year olds in the country who spends two to three days a week wheeling in a Hummer and isn't sure he wants to play t-ball.

-Tubing season in the river has begun! The last time I sat on this thing was to slide down the hill in the snow onto my parent's pond that was frozen solid!

Well, that'll have to do for now...I'll be back shortly with a report from the baptisms!

Who Invented Christ the King?

2007-06-19T15:20:00.000-06:00

Well, we've decided to put a couple adds in the newspaper again to let people know that we're still out there and to notify them about the fact that we're meeting at the Rec Center now.

Once again, the only call I've received about it was from a woman from Christ the King Lutheran Church who was incredibly upset about our name. I've listened to the message so many times that I almost have it memorized. My favorite part is, "40 years ago, we had a picnic and came up with our name--we made it up. I want you to know you have stolen our name and I resent that very much!"

I'm not sure what to really make of all this. Besides that fact that a large percentage of Lutheran churches are called, Christ the King--and many of them "made their names up" 80 to 100 years ago, it pains me to think that this would be such an issue for some people. I could see if a church had a name like, "Sacred River Blood of the Lamb" and we used the same name, there might be some frustration--coming up with a relevant and unique name for a church and having it copied would be a bummer.

In the end, I have to be glad that only a few people seem to be really hung up on this name thing and the people of influence at CTK Lutheran who I've talked to were not only generous with their name, but loving people bent on the cause of Christ.

I'm almost looking forward to this coming Sunday when our next add comes out to see if I get another message!

Roller Coaster

2007-06-11T18:10:00.000-06:00

Snapshot of CTK Durango

2007-06-06T18:40:00.000-06:00

I love it when someone in our church says something that reflects exactly what we are trying to accomplish as a community. Last night in our Farmington small group, someone was describing a co-worker who is a real character and a little "out there". The comment was something along the lines of, "I've never been to a church that I would be willing to invite ________________ to until now."

She gets it! How about that, a church where you can invite the people in your life who you would probably not be accepted anywhere else!

Party On!

2007-05-29T15:39:00.000-06:00

We had another fabulous BBQ party at our house this past Sunday for church. When we booked the Rec Center, there was one week in May (this past Sunday) that had already been booked by another group, so we had to meet somewhere else--bummer!!! Everyone came over to our house for some food, drinks, campfire, and general foolishness. We had some visitors, which is always nice. Kids ran around screaming dressed as princesses, dogs fought over tennis balls and begged for food and we all shared memories we have of the past year at CTK Durango. The two times that we've done this have been some of the best times of my life! I just can't describe how amazing it is to look around my home and see people hanging out, laughing, encouraging each other, and sharing what they feel is meaningful about being a part of this church community.

Oh, and burgers and brownies and beer are fun too!

Hummer Season!

2007-05-21T10:07:00.001-06:00

My season of driving Hummer tours has got off to somewhat of a rocky start. After finishing the final adjustments/repairs and prerunning trails all weekend, I had my first bonafide tour on Friday. It was a group of women who have been to Durango once before and liked the tour so much they decided to come back just to take a ride in the Hummer--no pressure there! The whole day went great until we hit the Test Track (an area with big inclines and off-camber obstacles that show what the Hummer can do). I had just finished climbing a steep ledge when the motor cut out. I realized immediately that I had forgotten to switch fuel tanks and the motor had run out of fuel. Priming the fuel pump and restarting the truck is not a huge deal on flat land, but with the nose pointing up in the air, I was pretty much dead in the water. After Jenn came to shuttle my people back to their hotel, I was able to finally get the truck started again. It involved winching the Hummer up hill with a snatch block pulley from my Jeep to a tree to the truck--then I had to use two jacks to lift the back end up enough to get fuel to the motor. In the end, I got back to town in time to bring the ladies back out and finish the tour (I'm not sure why the agreed to go back out with me!). I'm really hoping this experience was more of a final kink to smooth out as opposed to a foreshadowing of things to come!

Taste of Durango

2007-05-21T09:59:00.000-06:00

Yesterday was the annual Taste of Durango event in town. Three blocks are taken over by local restaurants in booths selling food, beer, etc.--the proceeds of which go to benefit Manna Soup Kitchen. Our very own Ruthie, who is the program director at MSK, organized the entire event including recruiting the 200 volunteers it took to set up, work, and clean up the TOD. Almost everyone from CTK was involved at some level with the prep or running of the day. I was most proud of the inroads and relationships Ruthie was able to establish through this. It will be interesting to see how we are able to better integrate with our community in the future because of the connections and impressions she made through the Taste of Durango. Another highlight for me was working security at the event and all the amazing free food that comes with the role of Security Roamer!

Being Gay in Church

2007-05-09T13:23:00.000-06:00

I've recently had the opportunity to meet with some friends of mine to talk about what it means to love God as a homosexual. Ultimately, I can't say we've come to many solid conclusions, but we have made a commitment to seek God and his truth above all else--no matter what it looks like. I may refer to this ongoing discussion from time to time because I believe it is one of the most relevant conversations a Christian can have in our culture and time of history. I would be interested in any (non-anonymous) feedback you would be willing to offer.

Here are a couple initial thoughts from my recent conversations:

---God loves gay people! No matter where we go from here, we have to acknowledge that Jesus died for everyone and any person, gay or straight, who is intereseted in knowing God throug him should be embraced and encouraged. Behavior and baggage come in second to establishing relationship with God.

---Scripture cannot be ignored. We may not understand certain things about God's word, but we cannot throw things out that look, on the surface, to speak against what we think or how we feel. We must commit to an honest search of God's truth which is presented to us in scripture.

---The vast majority of homosexuals did not choose to be gay. It may not be genetics, but even if you believe conditioning influences sexuality, a small child who is lacking authentic and balanced love or is being hurt intentionally by an adult is not choosing the sexuality they grow up with. There are some people, I believe, who choose sexual perversion as adults--these people are purposefully trying to do anything they can think of to distort God's creation--they are not, by far, representative of the bredth of the homosexual population.

Here are three questions my friends and I have agreed to grapple with in light of homosexuality and scripture:

1. What do we do (as homosexuals) with the reality that men and women are created to be compatible sexually?

2. What do we do with the fact that God has laid out a pretty clear picture of marriage between men and women and the relevance of balanced gender roles in raising children?

3. How much of who I am now has to do with things that I've experienced or things that were withheld from me in my childhood.

In Romans 1, Paul states that one of his purposes for writing to the Christians in Rome is so that he can encourage them in their faith----and so he can be encouraged in his faith by them. The bottom line in my relationship with these new friends of mine is that I want to help shepherd them in their relationship with God and I want to learn about God and his profound love for his children through their journey and friendship.

Once again, I'm so pleased to be part of a church community where these topics can be addressed. I'm glad we address these things, not in theory or doctrinal conjecture, but inasmuch as they relate to the lives of the people we love.

Show and Tell

2007-05-08T08:07:00.000-06:00

We had a great weekend in California! We packed as many meetings into a 72 hour period as humanly possible. We came home exhausted and inspired to continue in the adventure God has laid before us in Durango. It was great to see so many friendly faces and catch up with good friends.

One of the highlights for me was meeting with a couple students from my Santa Cruz days (over ten years ago). We had lunch with Hillary and her mom and her new baby boy. About five years ago, I had the privelege of marrying Hill to her husband, Sonn. It has been an amazing thing to watch her grow up handling the joys and responsibilities of being a wife, a school teacher, and now a mother. I am so proud of how she has brought God's Kingdom into the world through the context of the life she's developed. It seems like just yesterday that I was trying to convince Hillary to go down a hill on an inner tube with way too many people stacked on it!

I also got to see a kid (now a man) named Dan. In high school, Dan's younger brothers used to show up to church with sharpie tattoos covering their arms. After high school, people weren't sure about the wisdom of Dan apprenticing at a tattoo shop. Today, there is a six month waiting list to get a tattoo from Dan. He's opened a shop with a couple other guys and is respected for his art as well as his faith in an industry that tends to pride itself in its distance from God. It was so amazing to sit with Dan and hear about his journey. Of course, I also took advantage of the opportunity to let Dan put some of his art on me. There is a wide spectrum of opinion on the issue of tattooing. I personally see it as a combination of art and expression of what matters most to a person. For me, it has been an opportunity to illustrate my love for Christ as well as his for me--in this case, I was able to add to that the experience of supporting a guy who I couldn't be more proud of and inspired by.

We also met with about sixty of the people who have been supporting us over the past year in Salinas. It was so exciting to show them what God has been doing in Durango. I think the benefit of the meeting was as much for us as anyone. It gave me fresh perspective on the beauty of God's mission for us here. It affirmed his call on our lives and this community and gave me a renewed energy to reach out to the people in Durango who have given up on church, but still burn with a need for God. Over all, the trip was a great success. It provides a fantastic transition to whatever it is that lies ahead for us.

Easy Like Sunday Morning.

2007-04-29T11:57:00.000-06:00

Here at CTK Durango, we have our worship service on Sunday night. We meet at 6pm. At first, this was just a logistical issue. We wanted to visit other churches, we had dinner together (when we were small enough to fit around my dining room table), and we wanted to get to know the town. I guess we always thought we would eventually transition to Sunday mornings, but I'm starting to wonder if that ever needs to happen. Durango is an active town, to say the least. By meeting on Sunday evenings, we make ourselves that much more accessible to the people who live here. I've also noticed that, by meeting in the evening, there is a very relaxed and laid back feel to our meetings and worship. People seem to be in a restful mood. They're not in a hurry to get home and watch a football game or eat lunch. My favorite thing about meeting on Sunday nights, though, is personal. I've always struggled with the idea of the Sabbath. I've never understood why it seemed that only people who were not pastors or church staff were allowed to rest on God's day. I've always thought the leadership of a church community should model the life they expect their congregation to live. Our habits of worship on Sunday night allow me to slow my pace on Sunday. I can eat breakfast with my kids, clean the house, go outside and do something. I'm not stressed and out of the house by 7am and barely getting home at 2pm only to crash out after kicking the dog and reviewing all the things I could have done differently that morning. Instead, when I get to the worship meeting, I'm relaxed and ready to go. I'm excited to see my friends. I can preach with a cup of tea in my hand and it feels more like a conversation than a sermon.

I don't know that every congregation could operate this way--I'm certainly not saying they should. But...for us, I have to say this way of doing church is downright heavenly! Bring on the Sabbath!!!

Office Space

2007-04-26T20:21:00.000-06:00

We've hit yet another milestone in our journey at CTK Durango--we have an office. We are now located downtown in a building that is designed to accommodate small buisnesses. The owners are people who value community, so they encourage interaction between tennants and even have networking parties every month. Our particular office overlooks a big deck on the second story. We're pretty excited about having a space we can work in and the sense of community in the building fits our vision better than anything we could have imagined. My favorite feature is the CTK window sticker Steve made for the door--perhaps because that's about all the furniture we currently have for the new office!

New Location

2007-04-23T18:35:00.000-06:00

We had a great time at our new location last night. We are now meeting at the Rec Center almost across the street from where Pickles used to be. It was ironic to drive by Pickles which has now been repainted blue and white, sporting a Kettle sign instead of the giant, spatula-toting pickle. It's almost as if Pickles never existed.

We took some time to talk a little about where we're headed in the coming months. We also talked about what it means to be a church for people who don't belong in church. I love looking around that room and seeing that the likes of us have found a home!

Right now I'm really looking forward to our visit to Salinas. I hope a lot of you can make it to the show-and-tell at Salinas Valley Community Church on Friday, May 4th. We will be sharing a little about what we've been up to for the last year. We'll also be showing a video featuring our beautiful town and the amazing people who are part of our church community. We are also hoping to be able to express our deep gratitude for your support and encouragement in this journey.

See you there!

I'm going to be a house husband!

2007-04-09T22:17:00.000-06:00

This past Saturday, Jenn interviewed for a job at a new magnet high school in town. This morning, they called and offered her the job! She will be teaching English at a small high school designed to equip students to be more ready for the work force by the time they graduate. It is a great opportunity for her to be in on the ground level of a very creative way of doing high school.

This new development means a couple things for our family. One is that we will be taking our house off the market. By refinancing and cutting some costs, we will be able to afford our home--staying in our neighborhood will be good as well as keeping our house which has been a great place to host friends and church events. Having Jenn teaching full time will also mean that I get to facilitate the day to day life of our family. I'll be taking kids to school and keeping up with the house. While I've never worked in such a domestic capacity, the flexibility of the schedule will allow me to manage my pastoral duties during school hours.

This is great news for us and an incredible answer to prayer. Once again, God has been faithful to us as we've deepened our commitment to do whatever is necessary to follow through with our calling in Durango.

Easter

2007-04-08T22:15:00.000-06:00

Tonight was great. We had to scramble to find a place to meet when Pickles decided to close a week earlier than planned. We ended up at Manna House. I love worshipping with these people--we have such great vocalists that we are able to have quality worship even with a small group of people. Add to that the level of authenticity we value so much at CTK and you have a fantastic worship experience.

One of the highlights of the evening (on a less spiritual plane) was sharing the 30lb chocolate Easter bunny that was donated to us through the soup kitchen. Let's just say that you'll be able to tell a CTKer by the terrible acne we're all going to have tomorrow from all the chocolate we ate tonight!

Amazing Grace

2007-03-27T17:21:00.000-06:00

Last night, Jenn and I went to see a movie called, Amazing Grace--the story of William Wilburforce, the British abolitionist in the late 1700's. The movie started with two strikes against it in my movie criteria: it is set in a Victorian context, and it is about Christians (not that I have a problem with Christians, but I've never been too impressed with movies about them--ask me about the "Distant Thunder" series sometime). In the end, I really enjoyed the film. It was definitely a movie about a Christian and his struggle to effect change in the world, but it was more about how this Christian lived than showing him explain his faith. The underlying theme is the song, Amazing Grace written by a priest who had once been a slave ship captain. I was most affected by the elements of the movie depicting a man (Wilburforce) who is consumed with passion for what he becomes convinced is his calling from God. For all the passion and conviction he feels about his calling, he also feels as if it is tearing him apart. He leaves the context of the politics of abolition to try and recouperate only to find that he cannot leave his calling behind. To abandon his call would be far worse than the toll it was taking on him to pursue it.

While I don't endorse burning ourselves out in whatever we are doing, I see in this story the truth that once the Christ-follower encounters God's direction and call on their lives there is no escaping it, as joyous, liberating, heart-wrenching, or discouraging as it may, at times, be. I like the idea of being so captured by Jesus that I can only continue on any path that leads toward him--anything else seems pointless. There is something about the certainty and clarity of the vision that Jesus offers that overshadows the toll life can take on us all.

Anyhow...good flick!

The Evolution of an Adventure...or Ulcer

2007-03-23T16:03:00.000-06:00

Well, things have progressed rapidly in the last few weeks as far as our church goes. About a week ago, I had a conversation with the owner of Pickles Restaurant where he had decided he wanted to develop the half of the building we've been using on Sunday nights and lease it to us on a permanent basis--the down side was that he wanted about a thousand dollars more than our entire monthly income and we would be responsible for the construction. I wrestled with this for about three seconds since the thought of our own space and option for permanent signage on Main is really attractive. In the end, however, we decided against this option as it would stretch us so much financially and we would rather put that investment into people over a building (sort of a core concept at CTK).

Two days ago, I was sitting in Pickles (they call the back corner table my office) and the server told me that they were shutting down the restaurant on April 8th. Sure enough, all the Pickle mugs and t-shirts were on sale and they were preparing to lease the whole building to a breakfast buffet chain from Texas. This, of course, made the former offers obsolete and moved our time table forward drastically in terms of finding a new location. As it stands, we have reserved some meeting rooms in the community recreation center where we can meet on Sunday evenings. We intend to meet there as long as we need to until we can find a place that is more comfortable. The Rec Center is nice--don't get me wrong--in fact, they have a video screen in place as well as room set-up and tear down provided...for almost $40 cheaper a week. We are grateful for a place to meet and a little bummed about Pickles closing, but mostly looking forward to what God has in mind for us over the coming months.

Things to pray about are: making a smooth transition to the Rec Center (we've just started having a couple "walk-ins" on Sundays and don't want to miss out on that), possibly a different place for us to me more permanently that is as comfortable and accessible as Pickles has been, and the prospect of some cheap office space for Steve and I (since we could almost afford rent on all the food we have to pay for at coffee shops and restaurants during our "office time").

Spring Forward

2007-03-14T06:32:00.000-06:00

We are now beginning to enter the early days of spring in Durango. This is a new experience for me--seasons. I am used to the difference between rain and no rain, hot days and cooler days, but this is amazing. All winter we've been waking up to fresh snow. I have had a great time working at the ski resort. It has been character building to be sure--dealing with thousands of people and learning to relate to my co-workers who's highest priority in life is where to get their next free drink or cheap pot. I have been able to have some great conversations with liftys (the guys who work the chair lifts) and my fellow ticket checkers. I hope I've been able to be a witness to the authenticity and grace I've come to expect from the people of God's kingdom. Now, however, I'm starting to look to spring. With the warmer weather and longer days, the whole town is buzzing. Everyone is making their plans for their next seasonal job. The concept of new beginnings and transition are not foreign to this place at all. It is exciting and it seems you have an inroad with every person you meet, "so, what are you doing for the summer?" I'm even starting to get calls from people wanting to book Hummer tours!

I think I could get used to this seasonal life--enjoying the season I am in while looking forward to the one to come. I'm curious about this spring and summer. I'm wondering what people God will bring to us and how he will equip us to care for them.

My prayers right now are focused mainly on people. It seems that recently every single family in our church has been going through some sort of crisis. These situations are not fun in any way, but they do have a way of bringing us together. There is also our house transition (selling this one and buying a cheaper one) and finances for the fall. I've been reading a book by Dallas Willard called, The Divine Conspiracy which is basically a book about the Sermon on the Mount. It has a lot to say about how to live in the Kingdom and the importance of making our requests known to God.

I am most grateful right now for all of you who have followed our journey and taken care of us from a distance. I have been inspired and humbled by every one of you who have kept up with us and prayed with us over the last year. You remind me of what it is like to relate to Jesus. It is a precious yet lopsided relationship. What you bring to our lives here, the ways in which you have supported and cared for us, I could never adequately reciprocate. Instead of this being a shameful deterrent to our relationship, however, it seems to endear you to me all the more. Steve, Jenn, and I are going to be in California the first weekend in May. We'll be sending out the details soon, but I have to say that this visit is one of the things I am most looking forward to this spring. I can't wait to come together with as many of you as possible and share what God has done in our lives and in Durango over the last year. Thank you all for your sacrifice and friendship.

Entering the Podcast World

2007-02-26T11:34:00.000-07:00

http://web.mac.com/ctkdurango/iWeb/Site/Podcast/Podcast.html

So, we're trying something new at CTK Durango--podcasting. For those of you unfamiliar with the podcast, it is basically a recording posted on the internet. Last night, we started recording the teaching from our worship service to podcast weekly. There are a couple reasons for this leap in technology: one is that we have a couple who is going away for two months and they wanted to be able to keep up with our worship. Another reason is for all of you who are not in Durango who have been supporting us and following our journey.

I hope you enjoy it and we would love to hear your feedback and response to what we have going on. Soon, we will have things set up so you can subscribe to the podcast through iTunes. For the time being, I've included a link to the website.

It's quite possible that we are the only church in America where you can hear kitchen noises in the background of all our teaching (courtesy of Pickles Restaurant)!

http://web.mac.com/ctkdurango/iWeb/Site/Podcast/Podcast.html

Let it all hang out!

2007-02-20T21:38:00.000-07:00

Why is it that the story of many pastors today reads of amazing leadership and dedication and progressive pursuits followed by a catastrophic moral failure that brings it all crashing down over night? Why is it that revealed weakness or real struggle in our spiritual leaders is so shocking and disappointing? Could it be that the church's pursuit of excellence and execution has superceded the values of authenticity and accountability?

Jesus didn't hold it together when he walked into the temple and saw people making money off worship. He didn't act cool when Lazarus was dead. He never pretended it was all good to be crucified. Jesus blew up...he wept...he wondered if there might not be an easier way to do hard things. Jesus' life seems to have been a roller coaster of emotion, improvisation, compassion, empathy, and obedience. I don't read the gospels and see an upward trajectory of increased excellence and execution--I see Jesus responding in the moment every moment. Sometimes he is angry, other times sad or compassionate or abrupt with the truth. He seems to be honest with what he is feeling and experiencing--even if those feelings are not the most effective way to "win people over". He seems to care more about loving people in the midst of life as it happens as opposed to projecting that he is impervious to his surroundings and circumstances.

My greatest hope is that the people in our church understand that my failures often match (and usually immediately follow) my victories. I want them to see that, while I strive to obey God in every moment, how I get there can be sketchy and indirect. I want us to witness and experience a process of transformation as messy and unpredictable as it is God-inspired and beautiful. I understand about disclosure and being appropriate and wise in how we share information. I don't feel compelled to "prove" my brokenness for effect or reaction--I do, however, believe that it is authenticity, more than excellence, that honors God and inspires people. I believe I have done my congregation an incredible disservice if they are shocked to find out that I have real difficiencies and struggles.

I realize that healthy, stable people will probably be turned off by this way of doing business. I suppose in the end I may end up surrounded by only hurting and broken people searching for God in the midst of their complex and unpredictable lives...but I have to ask, is that really such a bad thing?

Going to the Deep End

2007-02-04T10:21:00.000-07:00

We have come to an important crossroads in our journey. Part of our process in moving to Durango was to raise enough money for Steve and I (and my family, of course) to live on for about a year. We had several reasons for this. The main reason was to allow ourselves some time to establish this church community at its own pace. We didn't want to equate people showing up with a paycheck. Another reason was that it gave a small group of people an opportunity to partner with us in this project. It has been a beautiful thing to see these people continue to pray for us and support us--for me personally it has helped me not feel so lonely in a new place to have such a great network of friends keeping up with us.

We've come to the place now where we will be able to stretch our financial support for another four or five months. Six months into our work here, some amazing things have happened. We are meeting in a restaurant which has worked well for us--in fact, the owner is thinking of remodeling the area we currently rent to be better suited for our group, opening the door for us to lease it on a more permanent basis (think office space and not hauling equipment every week!). About a third of the people worshipping with us on Sunday nights are locals and they have come to the point where they call CTK their church. One of these women has become involved in our budgeting and marketing and another guy is part of our worship team! We have also grown our small groups to the point where more people are in these groups than show up on Sundays (reflecting our high value on small groups). These are just a few of the exciting things that serve to affirm our decision to come to Durango and now our decision to deepen our commitment.

Jenn and I are in the process of selling our house. We bought it this past summer with the understanding that if we needed to, we could sell it and move to a home we could afford without a mortgage. We figure we can cut our living costs substantially by eliminating the house payment. Jenn is also applying for teaching jobs in the junior highs and high school. A job with the school district would give us much more affordable medical benefits as well as a greater earning potential than I am making working part time at minimum wage. If all this comes together, I will be staying at home with the kids and focusing on pastoring while Jenn teaches. Our goal is basically to be able to live on 25%-50% less than we are now. This would allow us to continue our work with CTK as well as keep to our principles in terms of letting our community grow at its own pace.

I am as confident as ever that we are exactly where we should be and it is exciting to see things developing the way they are. We love Durango just as much as we did six months ago, only now it is more about the precious people God has led to us than the mountains and rivers (even though they are still magnificent!). I am incredibly grateful to all the people who have supported us in this endeavor. Your feedback and friendship have strengthened and encouraged us over the last six months. Steve and I are looking forward to visiting California in May to connect with you all and give a better report of what God is doing here.

Jake is Pulling Through

2007-01-28T08:03:00.000-07:00

I visited Jake in the hospital yesterday and he was awake and coherent. I think today they will be moving him from ICU into a regular room for a few days. He doesn't remember anything after eating some pizza about a week ago, but he apparently overdosed on something. Continue to pray for him and that we are able to help care for him and communicate Christ's love for him.

Pray for Jake

2007-01-23T16:45:00.000-07:00

Jake is one of our friends at Manna Soup Kitchen. Last week, he apparently overdosed and is now in the hospital on life support. He is improving slowly, but they are still keeping him on a breathing machine and unconscious until his body recouperates. Even though the prognosis is favorable, he is in really bad shape and nothing can be guaranteed. Please pray that he heals quickly and is able to regain his strength once they bring him back to consciousness.

Jake is estranged from his family (who live out of state) and only has a couple friends in town. The thought of this guy dying alone with no one to mourn for him breaks my heart. Pray also that our CTK family can support him now and after he is released from the hospital.

We also long to see Jake come into a relationship with Christ--especially because we don't know all the circumstances surrounding his overdose.

Mission.

2007-01-20T09:02:00.000-07:00

There is a school of thought that says the more prepared you are, the more God will bless what you do. There is also a line of thinking that believes God's blessing and involvement in an endeavor can be measured in terms of how few "unpredictables" occur.

I don't buy that for a minute.

No sooner had Jesus humbled himself to the point of being baptized than he was tempted to give up his mission and inheritance for food and earthly riches. At the very point that Jesus' ministry was building on the momentum created by John the Baptist, John got his head cut off. When Jesus was confronting the fact that he was about to give up his life, making his way toward the people who hated him most, his friend Lazarus died. He spent three years falling deeply in love with twelve disciples only to have one of them betray him to the cross. Part of Jesus' human life was dealing with the uncontrolllable, the unexpected, and the junk that happens in life. He endured the temptation after fourty days with no food and water. He had to let John die. Lazarus' sisters were angry because they knew he could have healed Lazarus if he'd been there in time (and he could have been there in time). These things must have been incredibly difficult for Jesus--especially when people who didn't understand his love and mission criticized or abandoned him. Since preparedness and lack of "unpredictables" weren't going to herald God's blessing and direction, there must have been something else that Jesus looked to in measuring the success of his mission.

He definitely had a mission. He was there to sacrifice himself for love of people. He was also there to love people--to be the model of how God feels about his most prized creation. His accomplishment in sacrifice and love would mean redemption of sin and the establishment of his church that would continue his mission to the world. There were some prophecies to be fulfilled and, at times, Jesus seemed to be very directed and intentional--but he talked too much about his obedience to the Father for me to believe that he knew where he was headed every step of the way. I think there were times when he was just going--unwavering in his mission, but not clear on where it would take him at that moment. For me this gives great meaning to his ministry. There is such beauty in his spontaneity with the woman at the well--incredible depth in the time he spends thinking and writing in the dirt with the woman caught in adultery--wonderful intimacy in dealing with the woman who touched his robe as he walked through the crowd. At times, I wonder if Jesus' understanding of his movement toward his mission had more to do with looking back than knowing where he was headed next.

This is, perhaps, the point where I most identify with Christ. To be where we are--doing what we are doing is nothing short of God's direction and mission for us. I could not have devised a plan to move to a little town in the mountains where it snows for months on end. I wouldn't have elected myself as the leader of a tiny community of believers in a church that can barely afford the cost of renting the back room in a restaurant. But I know my mission. I know full well that God has called me to sacrifice myself for his church. I have been raised to shepherd people to places where they can serve the hurt and broken-hearted--sacrificing themsleves on behalf of this great love God has extended to us. I never imagined that answering that call would lead me here, but I can't measure my pursuit of God's leading by making sense of circumstances and I can see things coming on the horizon that will not make sense in conventional terms. I can only assume they are part of God's plan that I cannot see because when I look back on our journey so far, I see some amazing things God has done in the midst of experiences I didn't understand or plan for.

God give me the ability to respond to the path you have chosen the way Jesus did--with spontaneity, depth, thoughtfulness, and intimacy. Make us bold and relentless as we pursue your mission in spite of circumstances.

Moving Forward

2007-01-16T15:43:00.000-07:00

This is a big week in the life of CTK Durango. This week (or next week) we are kicking off our new small groups. Each group is different. We have a group of married couples, a group of women, a group of 20-somethings studying Ecclesiastes, and a group that simply describes themselves as sinners! As these groups start up, we will be arriving at something I've been interested to see--we will have more people meeting in small groups than we have attending Sunday services. This is interesting to me. I'm curious to see if the people who don't attend Sundays will start coming or not. Many of the people joining the groups are people who would not necessarily visit a church, but are willing to meet in someone's living room. Personally, as much as I would like to have people showing up on Sundays to worship with us, I my preference is that they be in small groups.

I'm anxious to see how the groups develop. I'm also excited to see what the experience of leading a group will be like for some of the people who are taking a real step of faith to be facilitators. Mostly, I'm looking forward to seeing how God transforms people's lives through the relationships that develop in each of these unique groups. Pray for us!

Top 25 Most Innovative Churches

2007-01-08T07:33:00.000-07:00

Outreach Magazine recently made their list of the top 25 most innovative churces in America. CTK made the list at number 22. It is pretty amazing to see us listed with communities like Erwin McManus' Mosaic and Rob Bell's Mars Hill. In the article, CTK earns its spot in the top 25 because of the fact that we are a church made up of small groups. This reality has got to be my favorite thing about CTK. Small groups are not a program or an element of what we do, it IS what we do. Our entire goal is to lead people into deeper relationship with Christ in the small group context where I believe spiritual growth happens best.

Our three focuses/values at CTK are Worship, Small Groups, and Outreach. With the exception of our weekly worship services, all of these things are designed to happen in people's living rooms and in coffee shops outside of church buildings--or in our case Pickles Restaurant!

Here's the link if you're interested: http://outreachmagazine.com/Library/features/JF07ftrMostInnovativeChurch.asp

A CTK Christmas

2006-12-27T07:45:00.000-07:00

Well, the dust has settled around Christmas. Only a few random cookies and scraps of ham remain of our celebration--although, I have to say our tree is still going strong...I guess that's the difference when you cut it down yourself in the forest!

Christmas Eve was an experiment for our church in relationship over charity. We wanted to invite a few of our friends from the soup kitchen to celebrate Christmas with us at Pickles. Our goal was not so much to "feed the homeless" that night, but to integrate our community with theirs. It was a good opportunity to spend time with our new friends outside of the soup kitchen. We invited three guys to the service. One of them was able to make it as well as the kitchen director who Ruthie has befriended. We had a great time. One of the activities we did was to split up in groups and each share what we thought the Christmas story would have been like for Joseph, Mary, and Simeon. I was in the younger group (17-20 year olds) and we were in charge of the Simeon perspective. I loved watching them process the Christmas story through the eyes of a character they were never aware of before that night.

We had a great Christmas dinner on Monday (even though I had to work at the resort that morning--long story). Basically, the entire Christmas Eve service people where there again. My friend James (from the hill) came and Ruthie brought her friend the kitchen manager and her son. My parents were there and Peggy (Jenn's mom) as well. It was pretty fun to have that mix of people all playing pictionary and unwrapping a huge ball of scotch tape with presents inside it.

In the end, I feel like we accomplished exactly what we were after. It was so cool to spend that time with James in a place other than the soup kitchen. I loved seeing new characters come into our story and watching the people from our CTK community embracing them as family. In my opinion, this was a great Christmas!

Go Ahead, Treat Me Like Garbage

2006-12-22T19:43:00.000-07:00

I've always said having a job outside of my role as pastor is a good way to stay honest in ministry. Today I discovered that it also keeps me humble. I check tickets at the ski resort. Today, as I was checking tickets, I came across a kid with her mom who had a 2-day ticket. She had used her first day yesterday, so I marked it "done" as per my extensive training in the ticket arts. I was shocked to have this woman (the girl's mom) start yelling at me. Apparently, she was under the impression that her daughter had a 3-day pass and I had just ruined their entire vacation--possibly the whole year. I tried to explain about the 2-day thing, but to no avail--the tongue-lashing was merciless, even after it was obvious which of us was in the wrong.

An exprience like this puts things in perspective. The next time I have someone thank me for a great sermon or insightful council I'll remember the great resort rant of '06 and put my pride in check.

My Friends On The Hill

2006-12-05T21:48:00.000-07:00

Today my friend James took me up on the hill to show me where he and a couple other guys are camped out. The whole time I visited with him I was trying to imagine myself living there in those tents. There is a grouping of three tents around a small fire pit. The snow from last week is starting to melt, but it's still all around. They don't seem to mind too much, but I'm not sure I could have the same attitude about the conditions. One of James' campmates was up there trying to get a drink of water from a gallon jug but the water was frozen solid, so he couldn't get any. He was shivering uncontrollably and he said when he'd gotten up this morning his shoes were frozen to the floor of his tent.

Say all you want about homeless people and why you think they are homeless or what you think they should do about changing their situation, but I realized today that those things don't matter much when it comes to the reality that my friends are up on the hill tonight trying to sleep in a tent and the temperature is declining quickly from 11 degrees. What they really need right now is a blanket--maybe a hatchet to cut some wood, or a jug that won't freeze solid every night.

In some ways, this reminds me of churches and doctrine. We can spend a lot of time and read volumes of books about doctrine--what we believe about God and how we interpret his word, whether we capitalize the word Word, and so on. The bottom line, however, is that while we try and get our doctrine straight, people are dying because they simply don't have real love. They have no Christ-following friends who love them with God's love and therefore are dying for lack of it. Maybe I'll never be a great pastor becasue I don't have a very complicated or well-defined doctrine, but I hope God holds me in the strictest of accountability if I fail to notice the people around me starving for God's pure love while I try and control and uphold a belief system based on things peripheral or irrelevant to that love.

The Hansel and Gretel School of Outreach

2006-12-02T16:20:00.000-07:00

We're beginning to look forward to the new year here at CTK Durango. Besides expanding our small groups and making the technological leap to power point, we are making plans to move forward with outreach. Over the last couple months, we have developed a great friendship with Manna House, the local soup kitchen that feeds homeless people. I've described some of the friendships I've personally developed and there are a few of us from CTK who have really connected there (including Ruthie who is their new Program Director). We are trying to decide where to focus our attention from here. Our goal is to establish relationships in several areas in our community, leaving a few people behind each time. At some point in the last two months, almost every person in our congregation has spent time at Manna House. A few people are connecting there to the point that they will probably remain involved on their own. My hope is that wherever we focus next the same thing will happen until we have people from our church serving all over Durango in different capacities.

The one thing that will make this work is the fact that everyone in our church community is realizing their personal responsibility and opportunity to serve people in our community fulfilling Jesus' instructions to love God and love others. We've worked hard to create this culture of personal responsibility and relational unity. I'm anxious to see it continue to develop.

More Small Groups

2006-11-28T09:48:00.000-07:00

For the past couple months, we've had two main small groups meeting (which means almost every single person in our church is in a group). We've been reading a book together by Dave Browning called, Deliberate Simplicity. It's been great to read and discuss the foundational elements of Christ the King Community Church. I have also enjoyed listening to the people in my group translate the concepts of CTK into our context in Durango. These guys get it and I am thrilled! Perhaps my favorite thing about these groups, however, is their potential for growth. Already, we've seen new people show up to the groups brought by their friends (who were also new to our community), now we are preparing to multply from two groups to five. More important than the idea of having five groups is the reality that each new group has the beginnings of creating their own community. I can't wait to see what happens with these people who have spent the last several weeks learning to love God and others in a deliberately simple way as they embark on their own journeys...sharing Christ through authentic relationship in the context of a living room or coffee shop!

Personally, I'm excited about a group that I will be trying to establish with a some of the homeless guys who live in the hills above the soup kitchen. Besides looking for relevant ways to communicate Christ with these guys, I'll also be able to keep my eyes on the foosball/chess prize!

Chess and Foosball

2006-11-26T16:20:00.000-07:00

Lately, I've been spending a lot of time at Manna House (the local soup kitchen). One reason is that it is a blessing to be able to be the pastor of a church and also be able to do things like volunteer my time regularly. The other reason is that most of the friends I've made in Durango are pretty much the homeless guys at Manna House. I'm having a good time getting to know a guy named Jim. Last week he told me he was the chess champion of the soup kitchen and challenged me to a match. I accepted even though I hadn't played chess since I was a kid with my brother and couldn't really remember which players moved where. Somehow I managed to checkmate Jim within five minutes of playing which simultaneously made me the soup kitchen champion and secured me a rematch the next day. Day two didn't go as well. Jim whipped me soundly two games in a row. Trying to salvage my dignity, I made some comment wishing there were a foosball table because I was sure I could beat him at a real game (the 99% of you who don't play foosball are laughing at that irony, I know)--big mistake! One thing you have to understand about homeless guys--they don't always have a lot going on...so Jim immediately seized the opportunity to challenge me to a game of foosball at the pool hall in town. I put up a good fight, but was bested in the end--even on the incredible Jim Fletcher (elder at SVCC and foosball prodigy) worthy Tornado table.

Ego bruising aside, I am loving the opportunity to get to know these guys at the soup kitchen. They are as ostracized by our community as they are fascinating and lovable. Perhaps my favorite thing about these last couple weeks has been that I actually get to be the one in relationship. Jim, Curtis, James, Lenny, and Clifford are my friends. Instead of being "up front" telling everyone how they should go about loving people, I get to do it and then tell them. If I am able to accomplish anything as the pastor of this church community, I want it to be that I am always able to do what I am teaching. I know that sounds simple, but it certainly has not been in my experience. Until now, I've mostly been so overwhelmed by the details of planning and implementing ministry that I've rarely been able to participate--especially relationally.

Charity Without Relationship

2006-11-10T09:33:00.000-07:00

So, I've recently read a book by Shane Clariborne called, "Irresistable Revolution" that addresses mostly the issue of poverty--specifically our role as the church in dealing with the poor. To say the book was compelling would be an understatement. Two points he makes in the book were especially poingnant to me. First was the idea that, as a whole, the church tends to relegate caring for the poor to a "minstry area" as opposed to a primary function of the Church. When looking at Acts chapter 2, we see and emulate the fact that the early church met in homes (small groups) and in the temple (corporate worship) and ate together. Clairborne points out that, while the church seems to be concerned with the poor, the language in Acts 2 is much stronger than simply helping the poor. Early Christians sold everything they had to take care of the poor. There seemed to be a general understanding that Christians would all sacrifice what they had for the benefit of those who don't have as much. I don't see this as a slam on the present state of the Church, so much as an interesting revelation that warrants some thought (and dialogue if anyone cares to engage). I sincerely want our church to be inhabited by people who do not simply wish the poor well, or allow for a benevolence fund, but who consistently make sacrifices on the behalf of the poor.

The second idea that struck me was about charity. The author points out that, while giving money and extra clothes, etc. to charitable groups is good, it eliminates the relational aspect of helping the poor. To some extent, donating to charity actually contributes to the gap between the church and the poor by isolating both groups from eachother by means of a "middle man". I took this to heart as our church has been spending a lot of time at the local soup kitchen in Durango. There is no question that I have extra clothes, things, etc. so I decided to try giving through relationship instead of my usual method of making a large clothes donation to Salvation Army. I discovered a couple things...first, it takes a long time to help the poor through relationship because the one guy you meet may not need all your shoes, jackets, old shirts, etc. I'm realizing that it's going to take a while before I can unload some of this stuff (which means, I guess, that the point is more about relationship than "unloading" stuff). Another thing I've noticed is how exciting it is to give through relationship. I met with my friend, Jim at Manna House yesterday when we were preparing food for lunch. Jim is a guy who lives in a tent in the hills of Durango all year (yes, even in the winter with several feet of snow). We've gotten to know each other over the last few weeks mostly by playing "Name that TV Theme Song Tune" (which might make me a horrible kitchen volunteer--mostly messing around with Jim). I was nervous that Jim would feel awkward about me offering him a coat I had brought, but I asked him anyway. He didn't seem to feel awkward. He was very pleased as the jacket I was giving him (which has been collecting dust in my closet for a long time) was a massive upgrade from the one he was wearing. He said he wished he had some way to pay for the coat and I told him maybe he could show me some off-road trails sometime (another thing we've talked about a lot).

I'm starting to wonder if taking care of the poor is more about meeting their needs through relationship than just giving them stuff. I'm excited about what I'm learning and anxious to explore these things more--if for no other reason than the fact that at this point in my life in a new town, playing "Name that TV Tune" for half an hour with a guy pretty much makes him my best friend!

May I See Your Ticket, Please?

2006-11-01T15:52:00.000-07:00

Well, I was offered both jobs I applied for at Purgatory and I decided to go with the ticket checking job over the lift-operator position. In the end, ticket checking seemed like a smaller, more tight-knit department. I think I'll have some great opportunities there to get to know the team and interact with all the other people at the resort--not to mention free skiing at Purg, Telluride, and about ten other resorts in this area!

I'm looking forward to the opportunity for relationship with this group of people as well as the chance to be part of a culture that is pretty foreign to me. I went into a snowboard shop the other day and it was surreal--like walking into a surf shop, except it was all snowboards. It's so funny to think back to my Pacific Wave days where I did my best to sell snowboards to people when I actually used a snowboard less than five times a season. This year I'll be in the snow on the mountain a mimimum of 60 days!

Job Interview

2006-10-29T07:08:00.000-07:00

I have to say, as much as I believe in working outside the church whenever possible, it has been a rough transition back into the world of counting hours and getting paid by them! $9 an hour just doesn't go as far as it did in college (I was going to say high school, but that was $5.75 an hour).

This morning I'm going to the Durango Mountain Resort Job Fair. The ski resort, formerly known as Purgatory, is one of the largest employers in the area for the winter. The good news is I would be working with a lot of local people and get to snowboard for free all winter. The downside would be the drive (25 miles) and that it probably won't be paying much.

If you would have pulled me aside 10 years ago at Pacific Wave Surf Shop where I was folding t-shirts and selling surfboards and told me that in '06 I would be applying for a job at a ski resort I would have slapped a PW sticker on you back while I laughed you out the door! I love to see God's story unfolding in the most unlikely of places, and yet, it all seems to connect somehow.

I'll keep you posted on the results--I'm guessing I shouldn't wear a tie to the interviews, but there's that little part of me that still wonders!

Speechless

2006-10-23T13:09:00.000-06:00

A couple weeks ago, I wrote about my love/hate relationship with transportation. A lot has happened since then. After coasting my Jeep the four miles down the hill to my mechanic (he's mine in the sense that I've invested enough money into his shop that I feel some ownership), we decided it was time to sell off my beloved machine and try to replace it with something that would tempt me less to drive over rocks. It was a difficult decision, but a wise one, so I solemnly made up some For Sale signs for the windows. After two agonizing days of driving around with the For Sale signs, we got some incredible news. Someone who was aware of our transportation calamities had given us an extravagant and generous gift. The only stipulation that came with the money was that we buy a NEW car...we were happy to oblige! After hours of research, I think we found the only car in America that we could drive away for the amount of money we had. We are now the proud owners of a Suzuki SX-4! Imagine a large egg with four doors and all-wheel drive. It's a great little car that fits our family and will have no trouble making road trips and driving in snow. The best part is Jenn is driving the Suzuki, so I get to keep my Jeep!

We are incredibly thankful to God (and our anonymous donor) for taking such good care of us and answering the many prayers grunted out from under cars on wet pavement!

The world is as it should be.

We Relish Your Worship!

2006-10-22T21:27:00.000-06:00

Well, we just finished our first meeting at Pickles Restaurant! It was great to meet in town. I'm not sure why, but it just felt more real to me. I think Pickles is going to work out well for us. We may not fit for as long as I'd like, but they were pretty accommodating for us.

We had a few visitors, which was exciting as well. It is so cool to see people starting to show up. I can't wait for more people to be able to experience what we have been living out these last several months.

Church as it should be

2006-10-17T10:17:00.000-06:00

Sunday night, we celebrated our last living room church service! Starting this weekend (Oct. 22nd) we will be meeting at Pickles Restaurant in town. We decided to have a BBQ to make things more festive (and because Joe Daniels makes the best pork chops in the world). The whole evening was fantastic. Joe came over early with his son and a friend of his. I sat in the back yard with this guy while he smoked a couple cigarettes talking about fishing and churches that meet in living rooms. Our whole group was there, milling around the house, kids running rampant, eating, laughing and generally enjoying themselves. My favorite moment was sitting next to my neighbor, Dana--each of us with a pork chop in one hand and a beer in the other--when it dawned on him that he was at church. "What kind of church did you say this was?" I will never get tired of answering that question! There really is nothing as inspiring or worshipful to me as hanging out with a group of friends, eating a good meal, talking about what God has done, and worshipping together. It didn't feel like "Christian" fun, either--you know, where you get the feeling that this BBQ is the most exciting thing anyone has done outside the Fellowship Hall in years and people use words like "fellowship" and the men and women don't sit next to eachother. We are not a polished group of people. There are some tough things going on in the lives of my friends (two people had actually got into car accidents on the way to our house!)--but we all know about it. We talk about it, and help eachother--we have hugs and crying at our BBQs to go with the laughter. Toward the end of the evening, I overheard the smoking kid from the beginning of the evening trying to articulate to Joe how he couldn't help but sing along with worship--he couldn't find the words to describe the fact that he had just worshipped the God of the universe for the first time in his life!

Pickles will be fun--a good place to meet that will seat more people than my living room. I only hope we are able to maintain that sense of family and worship I felt so intensely on Sunday night. I am literally desperate for more messed up people in this town to find us out so they can experience what we are so blessed to live with.

Come On Over To My Place

2006-10-06T08:12:00.000-06:00

There is some news for us Durangatans with CTK...we are deep in the throes of trying to find a place to meet. I believe it will add credibility and legitimacy to our gatherings if we are able to invite people to a neutral place for worship. Inviting a friend to my house for a BBQ or a small group isn't that big a deal, but somehow telling someone about our worship services and then inviting them to my living room doesn't go over as well.

I've held off on talking about this because we've hit some snags in several places and I keep celebrating finding a new place and then having to take it back when it falls through. At first, we thought we might meet in the Community Rec Center, but it turns out there are already two churches meeting there and I didn't want to create the first church shopping mall. Then, we tried for a movie theatre in town, but they didn't want to rent to us because of cleaning issues from the bands that play on Saturday nights (yes, we offered to be the cleaning crew). An elemetary school gym became available, but after we went through the whole process there, we discovered an unwritten, but non-negotiable rule banning food and signage.

Where we stand now is my favorite place so far, but hard to explain why. I'm working with the owner of a local resaurant who seems willing to rent us a back room that could easily fit 30 people. It is a place I've been going frequently to study because there is hardly ever anyone there. The name of the restaurant is Pickles--they relish your business. I love this place because it is right on the main drag in town--every person in Durango (or who has driven through Durango) knows where this place is, however, very few people have been inside. It's sort of a "Denny's" type place, and with all the fantastic resaurants in town, it tends to passed over in favor of more stylish places.

I'm really hoping things work out at Pickles. I don't know if it's an underdog thing, or the humor of telling people to meet me at a place called, Pickles, but I think it would be great to meet there. So, as a matter of prayer, I submit our search for a place to worship...Pickles or no Pickles!

My Love/Hate Relationship...

2006-10-06T07:40:00.000-06:00

I love cars. I am completely infatuated with anything that has wheels...not just Ford or Chevy, but everything. A pile of rusted parts on the side of the road is a "classic with potential" in my eyes. So how can it be that a man who deeply loves all things transportation can be in such a constant state of crisis with his vehicles? This doesn't have much to do with our ministry here, except that it proves to be quite a frustrating distration from the task at hand. I'm searching for wisdom on how to solve these problems--especially since they illustrate a principle of balancing/coping with the mundane of life while attempting to dedicate one's existence to something much higher in value and eternal implications.

I have dreams of bringing Christ to people--sharing the hope I have and the vision for God's church I've received. I find myself in the role of leader. My heart is bent on bringing people together in their own circles of influence for the cause of Christ. However, I get this horrible "cut off at the knees" feeling when the greatest obstacle between me and my mission seems to be physically getting the six miles down the hill into town! It has begun to represent to me the paradox of serving a Spirit-God from the confines of the material world. The positive points: I am compelled to be creative, I am forced to look to God for answers to seemingly impossible dilemmas, at every point of provision I experience profound gratitude. The downside: I can't get to town!!! I feel like I'm spending valuable time/energy under a car that has no hope of salvation and only promises to break at the next weak link as soon as I get it back on the road. I am finding it impossible to live on a tight financial budget with the costly repairs.

In conclusion, I feel that all I can do is trust that God has a greater plan for me than isolated shadetree mechanic. I have to submit to the process of allowing God to work in and through me in the midst of the mundane (and enfuriating). I will take the required time prostrate on the pavement scratching my head and express my gratitude to God when yet another solution presents itself. I will ask God to speak through me in spite of the fact that I had to get dropped off at the coffee shop an hour early or ten minutes late with grease under my finger nails and leaves stuck in the back of my hair. I will accept the reality that God does not require these things to fit my standards of order to accomplish what he has in mind on his schedule.

However, it IS raining outside and I still have to crawl under a car! *%^$#*@#!

Sweet Resolution

2006-09-15T08:02:00.001-06:00

I've mentioned earlier about the name controversy for CTK. It was difficult for some of the members at CTK Lutheran church to embrace the idea of a CTK Community church moving into Durango. I got calls from several people--my favorite was a woman who said it was a fire hazard to have two churches with the same name because the fire department might not know which place to go to in an emergency.

I called and left a message with the pastor of CTK Lutheran asking if he would be willing to meet with me sometime. Long story short, I went in this week and sat down with Pastor John. The man I met could quite possibly be one of the most gracious and authentic people I have ever met. He was not only supportive of our endeavor, but affirming of our calling and quite willing to share the name. I was impressed with his heart and focus in Durango and imagine that he will be a real resource to us as we begin our work here.

I want to thank those of you who were praying about this specific situation. I am pleased and humbled to see that a situation I thought would be characterized by fear and a "scarcity" mentality was met with grace and generosity. Sometimes I am overwhelmed with God's capacity to do things in ways I could never imagine--especially since, in the words of Han Solo, "I can imagine quite a bit".

One person showed up--so, why am I smiling?

2006-09-09T08:42:00.000-06:00

I had lunch with Dave Browning, the founder of CTK who is visiting us. We had a conversation about perspective and attitude when it comes to ministry. One way of leading in ministry is to hedge your bets. In this leadership method, you try to anticipate the story God is developing and smooth the road as much as possible by forseeing every contingency or potential interruption and dealing with it ahead of time. I come from a bet-hedging background. I feel immense pressure to anticipate problems and deal with them before they ever become an issue. My natural tendancy is to deal with things as they come--unfortunately I've become convinced that that is the wrong and borderline lazy way of doing business.

Dave and I talked about approaching things differently--his point was that maybe we should allow God's story to unfold as we participate and respond as opposed to trying to "steer" history toward what we guess God is doing. I found this conversation profoundly fascinating and curiously validating. Not only was it validating, but a concept-come-to-life within hours.

I talked to Vi on the phone about a week ago. She was the one person who answered our CTK ad in the paper who wasn't upset about our name. Instead, we had a lengthy (and fairly one-sided) conversation about everything from how political a church should be to why the NIV Bible translation is evil. She promised to be at our information meeting so she could deliver an article on the evils of NIV, but I half hoped she wouldn't show. I never thought (even with all the potential tragic contingencies that kept me up all night all week) that she would be the one and only person to show up to our information meeting last night.

I knew it was her the minute she walked in the door. She had that look of "I'm coming to a meeting, but I have a mission" on her face. She walked directly up to Dave Browning (I guess he looked more like a pastor than anyone in the room) and introduced herself. When all was said and done, without question, we had ourselves an information meeting last night! It was CTK Durango, however, that was being informed. We decided to forego the planned presentation and the ten of us (our team and Vi) sat in a circle.

On the surface, Vi is an abrupt and fairly abrasive person. She talked a lot about all the evil in town and how she hasn't been able to get the church involved. Her vocabulary and methods were what I would expect from a narrow-minded conservative Christian. As we talked, however, I began to realize that Vi has a heart of gold. Better than that, she authentically loves people--all people. When I asked her what she thought should be done with regards to the people she was mentioning (mostly homosexuals and drug dealers), her response was that we should love them, care for them, and most importantly pray for them. My assessment of Vi is that she has Christ's heart for the lost, but all her vocabulary and equipment is all wrong. I came away from last night's meeting with clearer insight and vision for the direction of our church.

We were suspicious from the beginning that information meetings and newspaper ads might not be the best way to bring CTK to the light in Durango. This is a small town driven by word of mouth and a "show me who you are, don't tell me" attitude. I have a feeling it will be the slower (by my preference) relational path to church growth for CTK Durango. In the mean time, I got a kick out of Vi and every person on our team agrees we were exactly where God intended us to be.

A Big Night

2006-09-08T11:08:00.000-06:00

Tonight is our first informational meeting for CTK Durango! I am really excited about this moment, even though I have no idea what to expect. I don't know if a ton of people will show up or none--I have plenty of coffee and pens, though! I'm mostly looking forward to an opportunity to communicate our vision for communicating God's good news to people in Durango. I desperately want people in this town to see our heart. I'm anxious to get past name trauma, arguing about what version of the Bible we use, and tracking down sound systems. I cannot wait to see small groups begin to grow and hear stories of people who have been unable to worship God for whatever internal or external reasons and find their place in our community. I'm confident all these things will happen--we just have to get through tonight first!

We've come to this point with interesting opposition. I don't know what to label spiritual opposition or simply life as usual, but it's been an interesting week. Within one 24 hour period this week Jenn's car broke down with a cracked head (the one we just bought three weeks ago to replace the Suburban that broke down three weeks before that), I bought some expensive software that didn't work on my computer and can't be returned, people were telling me I couldn't call the church Christ the King, and Steve Irwin (the Crocodile Hunter) died--not to mention anxiety about tonight's meeting and our difficulties finding a permanent place to meet for church stewing in the back of my mind! Looking at these calamities from this distance, they don't seem unmanageable, but let me tell you, it was heavy load to bear in the moment.

My goal right now is to try and focus all this energy toward being authentic and clear at this meeting tonight. This is what we came to do and it will play itself out one way or another.

Some things I'm excited about this coming week are a couple of meetings with local pastors (no, the CTK Lutheran pastor has not called me back yet) who I've met along the way. One of them is Joe Beckler who was key in our process of moving here--very encouraging and enthusiastic about the potential for ministry in Durango. I am hoping these meetings will be the beginning of solid "other pastor-type" relationships that I am really missing right now.

What's in a name?

2006-09-05T23:34:00.000-06:00

Friday is on the horizon--newspaper ads have been published, I have boxes of coffe mugs in my hallway, our plan has been set--we are anxiously awaiting our opportunity to introduce our new community to Durango. The phone calls and emails are starting to come in...one problem, though...the phone calls and emails I'm receiving are not curious locals, but patrons of another church. Apparently, there is another Christ the King Church in Durango--a Lutheran church. They have been around for 42 years and have built a good reputation as a place of worship as well as making their facility available to the public. I noticed this church in the phone book a year ago and (perhaps naively) decided it would not be that big of a deal--since, we are part of an organization, we don't have a lot of choice in the name selection. If we were operating on our own, I would be more inclined to try and choose a different name for the sake of distinquishing oursleves, but the nature of our organization is that we are a campus (albeit several states away) of Christ the King Community Church in Washington.

The people I have talked to seem nice enough, but extremely concerned that our presence might be confusing to the people of Durango. My initial thoughts are these:

1. I'm pretty sure someone looking for a Lutheran church will find CTK Lutheran church easily in the phone book and be able to distinguish between it and CTK Community church.

2. Someone looking for a facility to rent called Christ the King will find the correct address since we will most likely never have a facility of our own and CTK Lutheran does.

3. I am confident that our basic mode of operation--worship, small groups, and service will not tarnish the reputation of any church--if anything it will enhance the standing of all churches in Durango to have a community of people pouring their lives into any cause which promotes and serves Durango.

4. Reversing roles in my head, if I were to notice a church start up with the name Christ the King I would, in fact, be interested to see that they were interested in "keeping the main the the main thing" in terms of their faith and mission--that settled, I would want to welcome and promote them as much as possible, not pressure them to change their name.

Something I may regret in this process: as naive as I am, I wonder if I still should have forseen this and contacted the pastor of the Lutheran church before hand to, at least, explain who we are and possibly forgoe some of this awkwardness. I plan to contact him now, anyway--I just hope it doesn't amount to too much too late in his/his congregation's eyes.

My worst nightmare is that this would become such an obstacle to our counterparts in Durango that a God-seeking and upstanding church becomes distracted from their mission (one we share, by the way) by the likes of us.

Time will tell. My goal at this point is to do whatever I can to guide this small community of believers in such a way so as to please and delight Christ the King--oh, and Christ the King Lutheran too.

September 8th is closing fast!

2006-08-13T07:12:00.000-06:00

Life seems to be developing nicely in Durango. Our relaxed "vacation" schedule is coming to an end as we get busier and find more to do. Jenn has taken on the role of assistant cheerleading coach at the high school. She coached at Watsonville High for several years in California and is looking forward to developing a new group of girls here. I have been busy managing the Hummer tour business. I started a couple weeks ago as a part-time driver and now I am answering the phone and working on strategies to finish this season (through October) and prepare for next Spring. The guy who owns the business moved to Utah a year ago and has been trying to manage from a distance. The most exciting part of this job is it's potential for partnership and perhaps eventually a buyout situation. Someday, this would be a good business to own because it requires most of the work during the summer and then the rest of the year is background work developing relationships in the community--I think I would enjoy it and it would work well with the schedule of CTK Durango.

Steve is having a similar experience at the local soccer shop--meeting a ton of people in town and finding himself more of a commodity than he initially thought. The rest of our group are getting established as well...Heidi is generating work with mortgages, Daena got hired in her position of choice working with special needs kids at a local school...even my mom, who doesn't officially move here until mid-September has leads on a couple jobs.

Outside of jobs, CTK itself is developing and growing. We have continued to meet in my living room on Sunday evenings. As our relationships expand, we are finding more and more evidence that this is exactly the kind of church this community is looking for. Joe, Steve, and I have been putting the details together for our information meeting on September 8th. We have chosen our advertising and rented a room in the local recreation center where we will most likely meet on Sundays in the future. Our greatest focus right now is praying for people to come to the information meeting who will want to join small groups. I can't wait to see what happens!

Another bit of exciting news is that we will start meeting at the Rec Center for worship on September 10th. We decided that, by meeting on Sunday mornings we would net a greater amount of families who might not be able to meet in the evenings after bed times. We still intend to create a culture where people feel they have permission to "miss church" when being part of the community and people's lives requires it--sounds great in theory, we'll see how it works out!

This is really exciting! The more people we talk to, the more we hear that what this town really needs is a church who genuinely cares about its community and loves people. It seems that many churches use this "community" vocabulary, but turn out to use community action only as a means of pushing an agenda or promoting their programs as opposed to simply loving people. I desperately want to be different from those churches. I long to see a church that promotes its community, takes care of people, and humbly seeks after God.

Pulling Through

2006-07-31T06:42:00.000-06:00

Good news! We found a vehicle for Jenn to drive. Our 1996 Cherokee has done so well for us (even with the lift, tires, and endless trail beatings in the mountains of CA and CO) that we decided to buy a 1997 Cherokee for Jennifer. It looks like it will be a good vehicle for her and I've logged enough hours under the hood of this type of Jeep to be able to anticipate or fix the majority of problems that come up.

This week also marks the forming of the first small group of CTK Durango. Heidi has put together a group of professional women she has met over the last few weeks. Jenn (my wife) and Daena (who just moved here from Salinas as well) will be joining Heidi and four or five other women every Wednesday night for dinner. It is so exciting to hear the stories of how each of these women, in their own way, has expressed to Heidi that they have yet to find a place in "church" or have not felt comfortable in churches. These same women are now becoming part of CTK Durango!

Please pray for Heidi and the girls as they befriend women in Durango. Pray that God would give them insight and passion for these new friendships and that these women would come to know a relationship with God.

Another piece of good news--Steve (my partner and our small groups pastor) arrives some time this afternoon. He just finished teaching summer school in Salinas and now we're ready to get started here! We need to find him a place to live and some part-time work.

Ever step of the way, so far, proves to be more exhilirating than the last. I am really looking forward to building some momentum with this church. September 8th will be our information meeting where we invite anyone from the community to join our project in Durango--I am anxious to see who God brings to that meeting, especially in light of all that is happenning already without being advertised or promoted publicly.

The Road Gets Bumpy

2006-07-24T10:47:00.000-06:00

This past week was a tough one. We're still trying to flesh out the details of our finances which is working, but an arduous process for an extreme non-detail person like myself. To add to the financial melee, Jenn's Suburban threw a rod on Thursday requiring a new motor (the one I sold for $200 before we left Salinas because I didn't want to haul it to CO would have worked fine). Friday night, since we were down to one car, I thought I would do a little work on the Jeep so it would be easier for Jenn to drive and I broke more parts trying to fix it--barely getting it together in time to drive to work the next morning. We're trying to keep our composure, but these events have been frustrating to say the least. Church last night was good for me as we are talking about provision and the reality that God's provision does not depend on my capacity to make the right choices so much as it relies on my faith in the God who has put us here and promised to care for his children and his church.

For those of you praying for us, we are trying to figure out how to replace Jenn's car for the moment balancing price and reliability. Mostly, I would appreciate your prayer for our perspective...for grace...for wisdom...for faith.

Ready to Go!

2006-07-17T10:09:00.000-06:00

Well, I'm back in Durango! The time has come to actually do what we came here to do. My first good news is that I got a part time job driving tourists through the mountains in a Hummer. I can't think of a better way to earn money than off-roading in someone else's $100k vehicle! I'm looking forward to learning all the trails around here and getting to know the guys I work with.

Last night CTK Durango met at our house-it was the Daniels, us, and my parents who were visiting (considering a move to Durango). It was the first time I tried to include a teaching and worship element into our meeting (we've been having dinner together and just hanging out so far). It was good. I think we are all feeling a sort of "worship vaccuum" even though we've been visiting churches in the mornings. I enjoyed the time to reflect on God's Word and share with each other.

Back from Mexico

2006-07-08T18:10:00.000-06:00

I just got back from Mexico. It was a great trip! We finished the house we set out to build and the kids did great. My favorite part of the trip was when I was able to have the students commission Silver (Joe and Heidi's daughter who has been one of my high school students) to our mission in Durango. It was a precious moment to have kids pray for their friend who was moving away to be part of this church. I can't help but wonder what this is all going to look like to Silver and her brothers (and my kids, for that matter) years from now. Church, to them, will be something very different than what I grew up with. I'm so excited to have these young people with us to see what they eventually do with what we are only beginning to build now.
On Wednesday, Silver and I fly out to Durango. I really miss Jenn and the kids who I will not have seen for two weeks and I know Silver is looking forward to seeing her family who she hasn't seen for almost six weeks.

I'll be right back!

2006-06-24T19:23:00.000-06:00

On Tuesday (the 27th) I fly back to Salinas to finish out my last two weeks at SVCC. One of the weeks is actually the Mission to Mexico trip with the high school students. I'm really looking forward to the trip. Mexico has been the highlight of my year for the past seven years in Salinas. I love watching the students bond and support each other and experience God in ways they never do at home.

I have to confess that I am experiencing a big range of emotion on going back. I am looking forward to the time with the kids, but I am feeling a great deal of anxiety and stress at the same time. I'm not exactly sure where it's coming from, but it's beginning to have an effect on me. My desire is to push past the anxiety and enjoy the time I have to bring closure to my time at SVCC. My prayer is that I am able to rest into a godly attitude that enables me to do that.

I've been working on our proposals on timing for starting CTK Durango and it is pretty fun. I honestly have no idea what this is all going to look like. Writing down a plan is like making a wish list for Santa Claus--I'm putting down all things I would love to see happen without the benefit of experience to tell me what will likely happen. Is this going to work? Are people going to want to be part of this community? Am I up to the task of leading in this endeavor? WE SHALL SEE!!! I guess I'll have to put that all aside for a couple weeks, but I'm anxious to hit it hard when I get back!